Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The graphs compares the number of jobs around four sectors of the economy from the year 1920 to 2020 within the United States. In general, the graph compares how the amount of jobs increased or decreased in each sector while also striking a comparison with other sectors of the economy.

Starting from 1960, retail, agriculture and healthcare sectors had really low number of jobs. Retail and agriculture sat around upward of 5 million and healthcare had around 1-2 million. In contrast, the manufacturing sector had the highest amount of jobs around 15 million.

By the year 1980, the manufacturing sector saw a significant increase and was at the peak at around 20 million jobs. As compared to the other sectors, healthcare also had an increase with 5 million jobs and retail also had an upward trend to 10 million jobs. However, agriculture sector showed a decrease in jobs and fell down below 5 million.

By the year 2000, agriculture sector had no change but the retail and healthcare kept rising. In contrast, the manufacturing sector showed a significant decrease which continued even further in year 2020 and fell below 15 million. By 2020, retail and healthcare roughly had the same amount of jobs upwards of 15 million while agriculture saw a further slight decrease.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the main parts of the task by covering the four economic sectors across the given period, but it contains some notable inaccuracies in data reporting and timeframe. For instance, the opening sentence misstates the starting year as 1920 instead of 1960. While an overview is attempted, it lacks clarity in places and some trends are only partially or loosely developed. The data points cited for the initial and intermediate years show minor inconsistencies with the graph, such as describing 5 million when referring to different gridlines. To reach a higher level, the response needs a more accurate representation of the figures and a sharper, more fully developed overview of the overall trends.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The writing demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt to structure the information chronologically into paragraphs, moving from 1960 through 1980 and 2000 to 2020. Logical connectors and transitional phrases such as 'Starting from', 'By the year 1980', and 'In contrast' are used to guide the reader through the data. However, some cohesive devices feel slightly mechanical or repetitive, and referencing is occasionally loose, such as the pronoun use in linking ideas. Paragraphing is present and separates the time periods adequately, but smoother transitions between the individual sector descriptions would improve the overall flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

An adequate vocabulary range is employed to describe the economic sectors and upward or downward movements, using terms like 'significant increase', 'upward trend', and 'stable'. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary, though this is sometimes accompanied by minor inaccuracies in word choice or collocation, such as 'striking a comparison' or 'sat around upward of'. Spelling and word-form errors are minimal and do not impede communication. To achieve a higher band, the writer should incorporate a wider variety of precise phrasing and more sophisticated lexical items suited to academic data reporting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The response displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating control over past tense narrative structures for chronological data. There are some grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, such as 'The graphs compares' (subject-verb agreement error) and 'around four sectors' instead of 'across four sectors'. Punctuation is generally sound, and despite the presence of occasional errors, they rarely impede communication. For further improvement, the writer needs to eliminate basic agreement slips and incorporate a wider variety of error-free complex structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.