Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-04
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph compares the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in US from 1960 to 2020.
In this line graph four major key areas are discussed, such as manufacturing,retail,agriculture and health care. Manufacturing sector shows a sharp declination in jobs. Starting at approximately 25 million jobs in 1980, it steadily decreased to 13 million by 2020.
Secondly, retail market has an exceptional gain in jobs. However, in 1960 only 5 million people were doing jobs in retail, but later on it has shown a super gain of jobs in this sector by 2020 as 16 million people are doing jobs in this key area.
The sector of agriculture has also shown a sharp decline in jobs since 1960. According to data, by that time 5 million people were doing job in the sector of agriculture, but later on by the times of 2020 it reached to 0 million.
The health sector has shown an amazing increase in the jobs from 1960 to 2020. In 1960 only few peoples were involved in jobs related to health sector but after that as the time passes it reached to 16 million people by the times of 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5
The response presents an overview of the four sectors, but it contains several inaccurate data points and misinterpretations of the visual information. For instance, the student states that manufacturing started at approximately 25 million jobs in 1980 (whereas the graph shows it peaking at 20 million in 1980, starting at 15 million in 1960). Similarly, agriculture is incorrectly stated as reaching 0 million by 2020, and the initial value for retail is misreported. Furthermore, an overall summary or overview paragraph is missing from the beginning, presenting instead an immediate dive into specific details without synthesizing the main trends. Consequently, the task is addressed only partially, reflecting the characteristics of this level.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The text is organized into distinct paragraphs for each sector, providing a basic framework for the report. However, the progression is disjointed due to the lack of an introductory overview and weak cohesive links between ideas. Transitional phrases such as 'Secondly' and 'According to data' are used mechanically rather than to build a clear, logical flow. Reference words are sometimes ambiguous, which forces the reader to work harder to follow the comparisons. Paragraphing is attempted, but the overall structure lacks the sophisticated progression needed for higher bands.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate to describe basic trends, utilizing terms such as 'sharp declination', 'steadily decreased', and 'amazing increase'. However, there are notable lexical errors and awkward collocations, such as 'declination' instead of 'decline', 'super gain' instead of 'significant growth', and 'doing jobs' instead of 'employed'. Spelling and word formation are generally functional, but the range of vocabulary remains limited and repetitive, occasionally using colloquial or non-standard phrasing that detracts from the academic tone.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The student employs a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'Starting at approximately 25 million jobs in 1980, it steadily decreased to 13 million by 2020.' However, control over grammar is inconsistent. There are frequent errors in articles ('in health sector' instead of 'in the health sector'), prepositions ('doing job in the sector'), and plural/singular agreements ('few peoples'). While these errors do not completely obscure the intended meaning, they occur regularly and restrict the range of error-free sentences.
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