Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph compares the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between the 1960 and 2020.

Overall, an upward trend is seen both in heathcare and retail. In contrast, there's a decline in agriculture at the end of 2020 while jobs related to manufacturing fluctuated all throughout the period.

One striking detail that can be observed is the rise in healthcare jobs being the least number of jobs among four sectors in 1960 with only under 2 million jobs. It significantly rose to approximately 16 million jobs in 2020. Retail jobs went up from approximately 6 million in 1960 to 10 million in 1980, 15 million in 2000. In 2020 there's roughly 16 million jobs in retail which ties with the data accounted for healthcare.

While in manufacturing, it started as the highest number of jobs among four sectors in 1960 with 15 million jobs, it peaked in 1980 with 20 million jobs but decreased in the following decades. It only accounted with approximately 12 million in 2020.

However, agriculture and retail started with 6 million jobs in 1960 but agriculture plummeted in the year 1980 with approximately 3 million jobs, remained the same in the year 2000 and eventually went lower with only 2 million jobs in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response successfully covers all parts of the task by reporting on all four sectors across the period and identifying key trends and comparisons. There is a clear overview provided in the second paragraph that highlights the main upward trends in healthcare and retail, alongside the fluctuations in manufacturing and the decline in agriculture. The data cited is generally accurate and grounded in the visual source, such as noting that manufacturing peaked at 20 million in 1980 and healthcare started at under 2 million in 1960. However, some ideas are slightly under-developed or less fully explained, such as the concluding sentence on agriculture which could have integrated a more precise contrast with the rising sectors. A few minor inaccuracies in data interpretation occur, but overall the task is well addressed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall arrangement with a clear logical progression from the introduction to the overview, followed by body paragraphs grouping the sectors logically. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different trends. However, cohesion is sometimes faulty or mechanical, with transitional phrases like 'While in manufacturing' and 'However, agriculture and retail started' leading to slightly awkward sentence boundaries and referencing that is not always fully controlled. Cohesive devices are present but lack the flexibility and smooth integration expected at higher levels.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms related to economic sectors and statistical trends such as 'upward trend', 'decline', 'fluctuated', 'peaked', and 'plummeted'. There are some attempts to use less common vocabulary, though this is occasionally accompanied by minor inaccuracies or awkward word choices, such as 'It only accounted with approximately 12 million' instead of 'accounted for'. Spelling and word-choice errors do not impede communication, allowing the reader to easily follow the report.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writing demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, with examples of relative clauses and subordinate structures like 'While in manufacturing, it started as...'. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, such as missing articles ('in heathcare', 'in retail') and prepositional errors like 'accounted with'. However, these errors are relatively infrequent and rarely impede communication, allowing the majority of sentences to remain clear and comprehensible.

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