Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates the number of occupations, in millions, for 4 distinct industries of the US economy across a 40 years period.

Overall, it is clear that healthcare and retail recorded an upward trend throughout the period, whereas agriculture and manufacturing (from 1980) exhibited a downward pattern.

Looking at the details, it is evident that retail trebled during the period. it started from around 5 millions of job in 1960 and ended at nearly 15 million in 2020. Almost the same trend is recorded by healthcare. It underwent a moderate increase from 1960 to 1980 and a drastical climb between 1980 and 2020, starting with 5 million of job and ending with roughly 15 million in 2020.

Regarding the other two categories, agriculture underwent a sharp fell from 1960 to 1980, then it plateaued from 1980 to 2000, and eventually a slight decrease till 2020. It started above 5 million and finished on nearly 2 million. To regard with manufacturing, it firstly recorded a substantial rose between 1960 to 1980, then it fell up to 2020; it started with 15 million occupations and finished with around 12 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response successfully addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main features, trends, and making relevant comparisons across the four economic sectors. The overview correctly highlights the broad upward trajectory of healthcare and retail alongside the downward patterns in agriculture and manufacturing. However, some ideas are slightly under-developed or contain minor inaccuracies in data reporting. For instance, the duration is miscalculated as a 40-year period instead of 60 years (1960 to 2020), and specific figures contain minor lapses, such as stating that retail started from 'around 5 millions of job' when the chart shows 6 million, and claiming healthcare ended at 'roughly 15 million' when it reached 16 million. These slight misreadings prevent the response from achieving a higher band, though the overall coverage of key trends is well-selected and structured.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear division into logical paragraphs, including an introduction, an overview, and separate body paragraphs for detailed comparisons. Information flows reasonably well through chronological progression. However, cohesion is at times mechanical or faulty. The transition between sentences occasionally lacks smooth linking, and referencing is slightly awkward in places, such as starting a new sentence with a lowercase 'it' in the second paragraph ('it started from around...'). Furthermore, transitional phrases show some mechanical repetition or slight awkwardness, such as 'Regarding the other two categories' and 'To regard with manufacturing'. While logical progression is maintained throughout, these minor cohesion issues and mechanical devices place the response firmly in the middle band for this criterion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully conveying basic trends and numerical changes with terms like 'upward trend', 'downward pattern', 'moderate increase', and 'plateaued'. The writer attempts less common vocabulary, but this is accompanied by noticeable inaccuracies in word choice, word form, and collocation. Examples include 'drastical climb' instead of drastic climb, 'sharp fell' instead of sharp fall, 'substantial rose' instead of substantial rise, and the awkward phrase 'To regard with manufacturing' instead of regarding manufacturing. Additionally, pluralisation and countability errors occur frequently in lexical patterns, such as '5 millions of job' and '5 million of job'. These lexical slips and awkward collocations reflect the characteristics of this level, where vocabulary is functional but lacks precise control.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response employs a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, attempting multi-clause sentences with varying success. While some sentences are controlled and clear, there are recurring grammatical errors in verb forms, prepositions, and articles. Examples include 'across a 40 years period' (instead of a 40-year period), 'decreased till 2020' (where 'until' or 'to' is more appropriate), and 'fell up to 2020'. Punctuation lapses also occur, such as starting a sentence with a lowercase letter ('it started...'). These errors are frequent enough to be noticeable but rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the intended meaning without severe difficulty. This balance of mixed structures and persistent errors is characteristic of this grammar band.

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