Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph illustrate the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the usa between 1960 and 2020.

Overall,the retail and healthcare jobs showed an upward trend in whole time period.Meanwhile, the agriclture jobs decreased significantly and reached at the lowest value.

Begnning with,manufacturing jobs rose sharply and reached at 15 million to 20 millon.Between 1960 and 1980.it had the hieghst value than others.The manufacturing jobs decreased significantly and reached at 20 million to 14 million. Between 1980 and 2020. However,between 1960 and 2020. The retail jobs increased darmaticaly and reached at 6 million to 16 million.

Whereas,the agriclture number of jobs declined and reached at 5 million to 3 million in 1960 and 1980.It remained unchanged from 1980 to 2000.The agriclture number of jobs fell slightly and reached at 2 million to 1 million.Between 2000 and 2020. Although,the healthcare sales climbed significantly in entire period and reached at 3 million to 15 million. Between 1960 and 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion4.5
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy4.5
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response sits at this level because it is slightly under the minimum word count of 150 words, standing at 149 words (with text prompt words excluded). While the student attempts to cover the main trends in the four sectors, the overview is rather basic and the selection of data is sometimes inaccurate, such as stating that manufacturing jobs 'reached at 20 million to 14 million' which misinterprets the graph's trajectory. Key features are partially addressed, but the reporting of specific figures lacks precision and clarity. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to ensure the word count requirement is fully met, present a clearer and more comprehensive overview, and report data points much more accurately without confusing ranges or final values.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

Cohesion and logical progression are limited in this text. The response is divided into paragraphs, but the paragraphing structure is fragmented and unnatural, with single-sentence paragraphs and frequent awkward breaks. Cohesive devices are used repetitively and often inaccurately, such as starting multiple sentences with 'Between 1960 and 1980' or 'Begnning with'. There is a lack of smooth transitions between the overview and the body paragraphs, making the overall arrangement somewhat disjointed. To improve, the writer should group related data logically, use a wider and more accurate range of cohesive devices to link ideas, and avoid mechanical sentence structures that disrupt the natural flow of information.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The lexical resource is limited and minimally adequate for the task. The student attempts some less common vocabulary related to data trends, such as 'significantly', 'decreased', and 'darmaticaly', but these are marred by frequent spelling errors ('agriclture', 'darmaticaly', 'Begnning', 'hieghst') and inaccurate word choices, such as 'healthcare sales' instead of 'healthcare jobs'. Word form errors and awkward collocations also occur throughout the text, which occasionally causes difficulty for the reader. To achieve a higher band, the writer must expand their control of spelling, use precise vocabulary that accurately reflects the visual data, and avoid repetitive phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The grammatical structures used are simple and repetitive, with frequent attempts at complex sentences that are marred by structural faults. There are persistent errors in prepositions and verb patterns, notably the incorrect use of 'reached at' instead of 'reached' or 'peaked at'. Other errors include awkward sentence division, punctuation issues, and missing articles or pluralization markers. While the meaning can generally be discerned despite these issues, frequent grammatical errors cause noticeable strain for the reader. To progress, the writer needs to incorporate a wider variety of error-free complex sentence structures and pay closer attention to standard grammatical patterns associated with data reporting.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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