Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph represent the job opportunity available in manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the US from 1960 and 2020.

Overall, manufacturing and agriculture has been decreased while, retail and healthcare shown a significant increase.

In 1960, manufacturing was the leading sector with 15 millions job opportunity while, healthcare sector has the least openings for jobs. However, manufacturing reached its peak in 1980 with 20 millions jobs and healthcare sector rose to 5 millions. after that in 2000 the manufaturing sector started to decline and reached to 16 million while healtcare shootup to 11 million. by the end of 2020 manufacturing sector dropped to 14 million and healthcare reached its peak of 16 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses the task only partially and fails to meet the minimum length requirement of 150 words, stopping at 115 words. While an overview is attempted, it contains factual inaccuracies regarding the trends (stating that agriculture and manufacturing both decreased across the entire period, whereas manufacturing initially rose significantly until 1980). Key features are selected, but some data points are misreported or vague, such as claiming manufacturing reached 16 million in 2000 (when it was around 17 million) and 14 million in 2020 (when it was closer to 13 million). To achieve a higher band, the response must meet the word count requirement, present a fully accurate overview, and report data points with greater precision.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays some overall organization with a clear paragraph structure separating the introduction, overview, and body details. However, progression is somewhat mechanical, and cohesive devices are basic or repetitive, relying heavily on chronological sequencing like 'In 1960', 'However', and 'after that'. Reference links are occasionally unclear, and paragraphing could be improved to better group related trends. To move to a higher band, you need to demonstrate a clearer overall progression and use a wider, more flexible range of cohesive devices without repetition.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate for the task, allowing you to describe general trends. There are notable lexical and spelling errors that detract from the quality, such as 'manufaturing', 'healtcare', 'shootup', and awkward phrasing like 'job opportunity available' instead of 'job opportunities'. Less common lexical items are attempted with noticeable inaccuracies in word choice and spelling. To improve, you should expand your vocabulary range and focus on correct spelling and precise collocations for describing data.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The text displays a very limited range of sentence structures, relying mostly on simple sentences with frequent errors. There are frequent issues with subject-verb agreement and pluralisation, such as 'The line graph represent', 'manufacturing and agriculture has been decreased', 'millions job opportunity', and 'retail and healthcare shown'. Attempts at complex structures often contain errors, and punctuation and capitalization at the beginning of sentences (e.g., 'after that') are neglected. To reach a higher band, you need to produce more error-free sentences using a wider mix of structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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