Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the employment rate at the four distinct economical sectors in the US from 1960 to 2020. Overall, the highest number of jobs were in the manufacturing sector in 1980.

In 1960, retail and agriculture sector had the same rate of jobs which was a little more than 5 million whereas the highest were 15 million in the manufacturing sector .Healthcare was at the lowest in that year with 2 million jobs. In 1980, the amount of jobs in manufacturing division got increased to 20 million. Employment rate in agricultural area gradually decreased to 3 million, retail sector got a sharp increase in jobs to 10 million and healthcare was at 5 million employment rate.

In 2000, the job rate of agricultural sector remained quite stable with 3 million, jobs in manufacturing decreased to 17 million, retail and healthcare sectors had a sharp increase with 15 and 11 million job rate, respectively. Finally, in 2020, job rate in manufacturing division got a sharp decrease with 13 million jobs, agriculture was at 2 million, healthcare and retail increased to same rate which was a little more than 15 million jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the main parts of the task by reporting on the four sectors across the given time period and attempts to make some comparisons. However, the overview is somewhat limited, selecting only one specific data point about manufacturing in 1980 rather than capturing the broader trends across the entire chart. While key features such as starting and ending points are mentioned, some details are slightly inaccurate or under-developed, such as stating that retail and agriculture had the same rate in 1960 when retail was at 6 million and agriculture was at 6 million, yet other years lack deeper synthesis. To reach a higher level, the response should include a more comprehensive overview of overall trends and better integrate comparative statements throughout the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a coherent overall arrangement with a clear division into paragraphs, starting with an introduction, followed by body details, and concluding with final year figures. However, the progression between ideas is sometimes mechanical rather than flowing smoothly. Cohesive devices are used, but their application is occasionally repetitive or simplistic, relying heavily on time markers like 'In 1960', 'In 1980', and 'In 2000' to structure the response. Reference words are generally clear, but paragraphing could be better managed to group related trends rather than listing data year by year chronologically. To improve cohesion further, the writer should use a wider variety of cohesive links to connect sentences and show relationships between data points rather than depending on chronological lists.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, demonstrating an acceptable range of terms related to data trends, such as 'gradually decreased', 'sharp increase', and 'remained quite stable'. However, there are noticeable limitations and occasional inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as referring to 'economical sectors' instead of 'economic sectors', and stating that jobs 'got increased' or 'got a sharp decrease' rather than using more precise passive or active verbs. Spelling is generally accurate, but the lack of flexibility and occasional awkward phrasing restrict the range. To achieve a higher score, the student should incorporate more sophisticated and natural collocation patterns, avoiding conversational verbs like 'got' when describing statistical changes.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an attempt to use relative clauses and compound sentences. There are several grammatical errors and awkward structures, such as 'the highest number of jobs were in' (subject-verb agreement), 'retail and agriculture sector had' (missing plural article/determiner), and punctuation issues. Errors in prepositions within grammatical patterns also occur, such as 'rate of jobs' instead of 'employment rate in'. Although these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to affect the overall fluency of the text. To improve, the writer needs to exert better control over articles, subject-verb agreement, and complex sentence structures to ensure error-free sentences.

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