Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

the graph shows the jobs status in thuse four sectors in us between [redacted phone].

in early time helthcare sector was in a it's lowest range and production was at peak.

agrecalture was only one which was not growed bitween that timeperiod.reatil and helthcare both was shows groth in positive way. we can clearly saw in early stage of us economy was more depended on manufacturing and agriculture.at end of the decate 2020 us economy more depended on helthcare and retail. in early time manufacturing sector was boomed to 15 to 20 millions job, and after that it was singinficant dicrised 20 to nearly 12 millions job which was 46 percentage of decriment.and the other side we can watch helthcare sector gave most imprased perfomence,early first dacate helthcare contibute less than all other cenctor nearly one an half millions and the last decate graph shows helthcare was the most job provieder scector out of four.

over all we can see production and agriculture was gone downward and helthcare and retail was booming in upward.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by reporting on the four sectors over the given timeframe, making relevant comparisons, and including an overall summary. Key features, such as the initial and final positions of healthcare and manufacturing, are correctly identified, along with data points like the peak for manufacturing and the significant drop that followed. However, some ideas are under-developed or imprecise; for instance, the description of agriculture being the only sector that 'was not growed' lacks full quantitative elaboration, and the precise numbers reported for manufacturing and healthcare contain slight inaccuracies compared to the visual data. Overall, the selection of information is relevant and covers the main trends, placing it firmly at this level where some features are presented more fully than others.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement, successfully grouping information by sectors and comparing their trajectories between 1960 and 2020. However, the organisation is hindered by poor paragraphing, as the text is clumped together with irregular spacing and lacks a clear, conventional structure. Cohesive devices are sometimes mechanical or faulty, with repetitive phrasing such as 'in early time' and 'at end of the decate', and referencing is occasionally unclear, making the progression between ideas feel somewhat abrupt rather than flowing smoothly. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to use more sophisticated and varied cohesive links, structure the response into logical paragraphs with a clear introduction and overview, and ensure smoother transitions between sentences.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is adequate to communicate the main trends in the graph, attempting some less common items related to economic shifts and data reporting, such as 'boomed', 'significant', and 'provider sector'. However, there are noticeable limitations and inaccuracies in word choice, collocation, and word form, such as 'jobs status', 'helthcare', 'agrecalture', 'reatil', 'singinficant dicrised', and 'decriment'. Spelling errors are frequent throughout the response, including words like 'decate', 'contibute', 'cenctor', 'imprased', and 'perfomence'. These errors reflect a restricted control over word formation and spelling, though communication is generally maintained. To achieve a higher score, the student must expand their range of precise vocabulary and improve their accuracy in spelling and word forms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating comparative structures and reporting trends over time. There are, however, frequent errors in grammar and punctuation, including missing articles ('in US', 'at end of'), incorrect prepositions ('depended on'), subject-verb agreement issues ('retail and helthcare both was shows'), and run-on sentences joined inappropriately with commas. While these errors do not completely obscure the message, they cause noticeable distraction and difficulty for the reader. The punctuation is weak, and capitalisation rules are frequently ignored at the beginning of sentences. To progress, the writer needs to demonstrate better control over basic grammatical structures, improve tense consistency, and reduce the frequency of sentence-level errors.

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