Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The following line graph illustrates the figures about the number of employment in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, the number of populace who persued the Healthcare and Retail showed a postive response rather than the, Manufacturing and Agriculture. Similarly, the graph of Retail and Healthcare reached upto same value at end year.
The number of citizens who preffered the Agriculture and Retail was similar in the beginning year 1960. However, the Agriculture shows massive decline and reach below the starting point but in case of Retail it shows continuos upliftment. In case of Retail it value become stagnet between the year 1980 and 2000, after that it value continuos to fall.
The person who seeks to choose Manufacture shows decent increase until the year 1980 from that onwards it value continue to fall upto year 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response is 19 words short of the 150-word minimum, which impacts task completion. While the student attempts to cover all four sectors, the information presented contains several inaccuracies when compared to the visual data. For instance, the text claims that Retail and Healthcare reached up to the same value at the end year, whereas the chart shows Retail at 16 million and Healthcare also at 16 million, which is technically equal, but the description of trends lacks clarity. Furthermore, the discussion of Manufacturing and Agriculture contains confusing phrasing and inaccurate tracking of the numbers. To reach a higher band, the student must meet the word count requirement, present data accurately without misinterpretations, and provide a clearer overview of the main trends.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
There is some basic organisation with an introductory sentence and paragraph breaks, but the response lacks clear overall progression. Transitions between sentences feel mechanical and sometimes disjointed, as seen with phrases like "In case of Retail it value become stagnet". Referencing is frequently unclear, making it difficult to follow which data point or time period the writer is referring to. To improve coherence and cohesion, the student needs to use cohesive devices more accurately, ensure logical sequencing of ideas between sentences, and maintain a clear thread of comparison throughout the body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is limited and barely adequate for the task. There are noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices, such as "number of populace", "persued", "upliftment", and "stagnet" (stagnant). Spelling and word formation issues are present throughout the text, for example "preffered" and "continuos". These errors occasionally cause difficulty for the reader and obscure the precise meaning of the data. To achieve a higher score, the student should expand their vocabulary range, use precise terms for describing statistical changes (such as 'fluctuate', 'decline', or 'remain stable'), and carefully proofread for spelling and word form accuracy.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response displays a limited range of sentence structures, and attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty. There are frequent grammatical errors involving subject-verb agreement, prepositions, and verb forms, such as "figures about the number of employment", "reached upto same value", and "it value continuos to fall". Punctuation and article usage also show persistent inaccuracies. These frequent errors can cause difficulty for the reader. To improve in this area, the student should work on constructing accurate simple and complex sentences, mastering basic verb tenses for describing past data, and ensuring correct agreement between subjects and verbs.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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