Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph represents the employment figures in four distinctive economic sectors of USA during the period 1960 and 2020.

Overall, healthcare centres represented the the most jobs followed by retailing. Moreover, manufacturing industry showed a decrease in employment levels while agriculture remained the least employment sector during the period.

In 1960, manufacturing represented the most jobs with 15 employees and it increased to 20 workers by the year 1980. After that, it had a dramatic decrease in the numbers of jobs by the end of the year 2020, stood at approximately 13. Moreover, the figure of employment for retailing around 6 in 1960 and it had a significant increase in the number of employees by the year 2000, representing exact 15 jobs. In 2020, the number of jobs increased to 16.

Furthermore, healthcare centres represented only 2 employees in 1960 and it rose to 5 workers in 1980. In 2020, the number of people employed became same as retailing, 16 employees. In addition, the employment level of agriculture was 5 workers in 1960, it decreased to 3 employees in 1980 and remained constant by the year 2000. In 2020, the figure dropped to 2 employees.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response successfully covers all four economic sectors shown in the graph and provides an overview of the main trends. However, the data points selected are occasionally inaccurate or misread, particularly regarding units and specific values (e.g., referring to millions of jobs as 'employees' or 'jobs', and misstating agriculture starting figures). Furthermore, the overview statement contains inaccuracies, such as claiming healthcare centres represented the most jobs overall when retail and healthcare ended up tied at the highest level in 2020. These flaws place the task achievement aspect in the middle band, where all parts are addressed, but some details are under-developed or inexact.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The report demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear paragraph structure separating the overview, manufacturing and retail, and healthcare and agriculture sectors. Information is grouped logically by sector. However, cohesion relies on somewhat repetitive and mechanical transitional devices such as 'Moreover', 'In addition', and 'Furthermore'. Referencing is occasionally faulty, and progression within sentences could be smoother to ensure seamless logical flow. This places the organizational quality comfortably within the middle band for cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully attempting less common and sector-specific terms like 'employment figures', 'economic sectors', and 'dramatic decrease'. However, there are notable lexical inaccuracies and awkward word choices, such as calling millions of jobs 'employees' or 'workers' (e.g., '15 employees' instead of '15 million jobs'), which impacts precision. Spelling is generally accurate, but these word choice slips prevent the lexical score from rising higher.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writing displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating control over past tense narration ('represented', 'increased', 'dropped'). There are some grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, such as missing prepositions or incorrect verb forms in clauses like 'the figure of employment for retailing around 6' (missing verb) and 'became same as retailing'. Despite these errors, they rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the intended data points without significant confusion.

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