Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates information on the number of jobs in 4 different sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 to 2020 recorded in millions.

Overall, We can say that jobs in the healthcare profession has gradually increased over time whereas jobs in agriculture sector had a steady decline.

Generally sepaking, the manufacturing sector in 1960 offered jobs for 15 million people by 1980 the jobs had a sudden spike upto 20 million from then the figure subsequently started dropping to reaching 13 million by 2020. Furthermore in agriculture the figures had a gradual reduction in number of jobs over period of time with just over 6 million in 1960 to 3 million and 2 million respectively in 2000 and 2020 and this sector hit the lowest of all others in the year 2020.

In addition to this, Retail and healthcare sector saw a steady increase in number of jobs over the period of time by 2020 they maintained same figures of 16 million and these were the only 2 sectors which maintained the highest job offerings in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response successfully covers all parts of the task by reporting on all four sectors and making relevant comparisons across the given timeframe. An overview is present, highlighting the main contrast between healthcare and agriculture. However, some areas are slightly under-developed; for instance, the description of the retail sector lacks deeper comparison with manufacturing in the middle decades. The data points cited, such as manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 and healthcare finishing at 16 million in 2020, accurately reflect the visual data. To reach a higher band, the overview could integrate more overarching trends and the body paragraphs could explore the magnitude of changes more thoroughly.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The writing exhibits a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt to structure the response into an introduction, an overview, and separate body paragraphs for the categories. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty, as seen in run-on sentences and punctuation issues like comma splices (e.g., 'by 1980 the jobs had a sudden spike... from then the figure subsequently started dropping'). Paragraphing is utilised, but the flow between sentences can feel slightly abrupt due to limited or repetitive cohesive devices like 'Furthermore' and 'In addition to this'. Referencing and logical progression are generally maintained, but clearer signposting and better integration of sentences would elevate the coherence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'subsequently', 'reduction', and 'professions'. Nevertheless, there are noticeable spelling and word-choice errors, such as 'sepaking' instead of 'speaking', and awkward phrasing like 'jobs in the healthcare profession has gradually increased' instead of 'employment in the healthcare sector'. Collocations are occasionally imprecise, and lexical errors require the reader to occasionally re-read, though they do not seriously impede communication. Expanding the variety of precise reporting verbs and adjectives would help strengthen this area.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response employs a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some control over structure. However, there are persistent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'jobs in the healthcare profession has') and run-on sentences lacking proper punctuation. Prepositional and article usage occasionally falters, such as 'over period of time' instead of 'over a period of time'. While these errors rarely impede overall communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent the response from achieving a higher score. Incorporating more error-free complex structures and refining punctuation would improve the grammatical range and accuracy.

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