Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph reveals about the number of jobs across four

major economic sectors in the uk over a 60-year period form 1960 to 2020

overall the employment landscape underwent a major shift with the two service fields retail and healthcare experiencing growth conversely traditional sectors manufacturing and agriculture overall long term decline by the end of timefame

looking at the expanding sectors healthcare recorded the most dramatic increase starting at 2 million jods in 1960

it grew to 5 million in 1980 before surging up to 11 million by 2000 and finishing at peak of 14 million by 2020 and climbing from 6 million jobs in 1960 to 10 million in 1980 before reaching 16 million in 2020 to become the largest employer the four categories

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response addresses the prompt only partially and fails to meet the minimum length requirement of 150 words, stopping abruptly at 127 words. While you attempt to provide an overview and mention several sectors, the information presented contains several inaccuracies when compared to the visual data. For instance, you state that retail climbed to 16 million in 2020 to become the largest employer, but you also mention healthcare peaking at 14 million (whereas the graph shows healthcare reaching 16 million). Furthermore, you incorrectly identify the country as the UK in your introduction, whereas the prompt specifies the US. To improve, ensure all data points are accurately transcribed and supported, maintain correct contextual details, and develop your response fully to meet the word count.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The text displays some basic organization, but overall progression is hindered by poor formatting, a lack of clear paragraphing, and missing punctuation. The response begins with a fragmented introductory sentence, and the overview runs directly into the body paragraph without proper structural breaks. While you attempt to use transitional phrases such as 'overall', 'conversely', and 'looking at the expanding sectors', cohesive devices are applied mechanically or are missing altogether, particularly in the incomplete final sentence where the comparison 'the four categories' lacks a preposition and connection. To achieve a higher band, you need to structure your writing into distinct paragraphs—an introduction, an overview, and clearly separated body paragraphs—and use cohesive devices more naturally to guide the reader through the data.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common economic and descriptive terms such as 'landscape', 'experience growth', 'dramatic increase', and 'surging'. However, your writing contains several noticeable lexical and spelling errors that impede communication. For example, you misspelled 'form' instead of 'from', 'timefame' instead of 'timeframe', and 'jods' instead of 'jobs'. Additionally, there are word choice slips, such as referring to the UK instead of the US, which detracts from precision. To improve your lexical score, you should proofread your work carefully to eliminate spelling mistakes, ensure accurate word forms, and incorporate more precise vocabulary related to trends and data reporting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response shows a very limited range of structures with frequent grammatical and punctuation errors that cause difficulty for the reader. The text lacks basic punctuation, missing periods and capital letters at sentence boundaries entirely, resulting in run-on phrasing and fragmented clauses. There are also errors in grammatical patterns and prepositions, such as 'overall long term decline by the end of timefame' which lacks necessary verbs, and a confusing trailing clause at the end of the response ('and climbing from 6 million jobs...'). To reach a higher band, you must use a healthier mix of simple and complex sentence forms, ensure proper subject-verb agreement and prepositional use, and apply standard punctuation to demarcate sentences clearly.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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