Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph represents the employment data in the four parts of the economy in the United States from 1960 to 2020. The rising and decreasing numbers in the different sector in during the given time period is discussed.

During the 1960 and 2000 period, the manufacturing sector hovered around at the same level that is around 15 Million jobs. The retail and healthcare sector increased dramatically from around 6 Million jobs to 15 Million jobs and around 2 Million to around 10 Million jobs respectively. While the agriculture sector declined from about 5 Million to around 3 Million and stayed there till the 2020.

During the 2000 and 2020 period, this was the first time when the manufacturing sector was surpassed by the retail and the healthcare sector and both crossed 15 Million jobs, the manufacturing sector declined from the peak 20 Million job in 1980 to end up around 13 Million jobs in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the task by reporting data for all four economic sectors over the sixty-year period, but some parts are developed more fully than others. An overview is attempted in the opening, but key features lack complete clarity. For instance, the writer states that manufacturing 'hovered around at the same level' between 1960 and 2000, missing the noticeable upward surge to 20 million jobs in 1980 followed by a decline, which is a significant trend omission. Additionally, minor data inaccuracies appear, such as stating agriculture declined 'from about 5 Million' when it started at 6 million in 1960. While the main trends are touched upon, the lack of precision and under-development of certain key movements prevent the response from achieving a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt at logical organisation, making use of paragraphing to group information into introduction, mid-period, and late-period details. Cohesive devices are employed to structure the text, such as 'During the 1960 and 2000 period' and 'While the agriculture sector declined'. However, cohesion can sometimes be mechanical or slightly awkward, as seen in the phrase 'this was the first time when the manufacturing sector was surpassed'. Referencing is generally clear, but the transitional phrasing between paragraphs lacks the smooth progression characteristic of higher bands. Paragraphing is present and helps segregate the time frames, though internal cohesion within the paragraphs requires tighter management.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating topic-specific terms such as 'employment data', 'sector', 'hovered', and 'declined'. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary like 'surpassed' and 'dramatically'. However, some word choice and word form errors occur, such as writing 'different sector in during' (awkward preposition and pluralisation) and referencing a 'peak 20 Million job' (missing plural). These lexical inaccuracies do not impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the general trends, but they reflect a typical profile of a response that sits comfortably at this level without demonstrating the precision and flexibility of a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at subordinate clauses with 'While the agriculture sector declined' and 'when the manufacturing sector was surpassed'. However, control over grammar and punctuation is inconsistent. There are frequent grammatical errors, such as article omission and misuse ('the manufacturing sector', 'the retail and healthcare sector'), tense confusion regarding time periods ('During the 1960 and 2000 period'), and clumsy prepositional phrases like 'hovered around at the same level'. These errors require some effort from the reader to untangle, placing the grammatical performance firmly within this band where frequent errors persist even though communication remains largely intact.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.