Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

manufacturing gave most of the jobs to the poeple before 2000's it hits to 20 million jobs in 1980's which is the most by any sector in the history. but after 2010's the retail overtakes it and at the 2020 the retail gives jobs to more people then the manufacturing and in 2020's it gives about more then 15 million jobs to people in US while manufacturing give 13 million jobs.

Now we discuss about the healthcaare which gives less jobs to people in 1960's to 80's but after that it grows more in 2000's and gives more then 15 million people jobs and in to 2020 it is equllant to the retail with the 15 million jobs to people these two are the highest on average to give people the job.

furthermore, the agriculture which is the most lest job giving sector it is the highest at 1960 with more the 5 million people but ater that it is decline mostely because of the technology people use after that there will be a less use of people and it decline in the 1980 to 2000's to about 2.5 million jobs and after the advancment in the technology it become lesser and lesser in 2020 it become the least sector to give jobs to the people about less then 2 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the task partially, attempting to present an overview of the four economic sectors over the period. However, some key features and comparisons are under-developed or inaccurately reported. For instance, the text claims that retail overtook manufacturing after the 2010s, whereas the chart shows retail rising steadily and matching healthcare by 2020 at around 16 million jobs, while manufacturing actually peaked in 1980 at 20 million rather than hitting 20 million 'before 2000's'. The overview is somewhat obscured by informal commentary and conversational framing, such as 'Now we discuss about the healthcaare', which detracts from an objective academic tone.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

There is some organisation in the response, with distinct paragraphs dedicated to different sectors, but there is no clear overall progression or standard academic structure. Cohesive devices are frequently inadequate, inaccurate, or over-used, relying heavily on basic linkers and repetitive phrasing like 'after that' and 'to people' throughout the text. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the mechanical transitions—such as 'Now we discuss about' and 'furthermore, the agriculture which is the most lest job giving sector'—disrupt the flow and fail to maintain a logical sequence of ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and minimally adequate for the task, containing noticeable errors that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader. There are persistent spelling mistakes and incorrect word forms, such as 'poeple', 'healthcaare', 'equllant', 'lest', and 'advancment'. The range of vocabulary is basic and repetitive, with frequent reliance on simple terms like 'gives jobs', 'sector', and 'people'. Attempts to use less common or descriptive items often result in unnatural phrasing, such as 'most lest job giving sector' and 'technology people use'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer uses a limited range of structures, relying mostly on repetitive clause chains joined by conjunctions. Attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty, leading to run-on sentences with missing punctuation. There are frequent errors in grammar, including missing or incorrect articles ('the retail', 'the healthcare', 'the agriculture'), prepositions ('in 1960's to 80's', 'in to 2020'), verb forms and tenses ('it hits', 'the retail overtakes', 'manufacturing give'), and subject-verb agreement. These frequent errors cause some difficulty for the reader in tracing precise timelines.

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