Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the details related the number of jobs in four sectors (Manufacturing,Retail,Agriculture and Healthcare) of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it is clear that Retail and Healthcare goes up while, Manufacturing droped after rose.On the other hand Agriculture went up but showed reamianed stay behaviour.

Turning to the Retail and Healthcare, both of these trends showed continuous clime over the period.Firstly, Healthcare was the lowest figure in 1960 in jobs market at around 2.5 million.Although, Retailing was the second lowest sector in the USA jobs market in 1960 at 6 million.However, both sectors end up in 2020 at same number of jobs around 16 million.

Turning to the remaining, Manufacturing was the largest sector in 1960 at 15 million while, Agriculture was the second lowest section in the same time.But, after sometime in 1980 Manufacturing went up and touch all time high number at 20 million while, in the same time Agriculture went down at 3 million in same period of time.However, Agriculture sector remained same till 2020.On the other hand, Manufacturing droped and fell to around 12.5 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response successfully addresses all parts of the task by presenting an overview of the main trends and selecting key data points for comparison across the four economic sectors. The main features are identified, such as the overall rise in Retail and Healthcare and the fluctuating nature of Manufacturing. However, some ideas are under-developed or inaccurately described. For instance, the claim that Agriculture 'showed reamianed stay behaviour' after going up is contradictory to the graph, which shows a decline followed by a plateau. Similarly, some figures contain minor inaccuracies, such as stating Manufacturing fell to 12.5 million in 2020 when the chart shows it at approximately 13 million. Despite these minor flaws, the report adequately covers the visual data and outlines the general trajectory of the sectors.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The text presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt to structure the information logically. The response is divided into paragraphs, starting with an introduction, moving to an overview, and then dedicating body paragraphs to grouped sectors. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty. The use of transitional markers like 'Turning to the Retail and Healthcare' and 'Turning to the remaining' feels repetitive and awkward. Additionally, referencing is occasionally unclear, as seen in expressions like 'both of these trends showed continuous clime' where the flow between sentences is disrupted by mechanical transitions and abrupt shifts in focus.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, but the range is somewhat limited and contains noticeable errors in word choice and spelling that prevent the response from reaching a higher band. The student attempts less common vocabulary, but this often results in collocation errors or incorrect word forms, such as 'continuous clime' instead of 'continuous climb', 'reamianed stay behaviour', and 'droped' instead of 'dropped'. Other awkward phrasings like 'jobs market' and 'touch all time high number' demonstrate an insufficient command of precise academic lexis and collocation, though meaning is still conveyed successfully despite these inaccuracies.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating a baseline control of grammatical structures. There are several grammatical errors and punctuation slips throughout the text, including tense inconsistencies and awkward phrasing such as 'Retail and Healthcare goes up while, Manufacturing droped after rose' and 'Although, Retailing was the second lowest sector'. Article usage and prepositions are also occasionally mishandled, as in 'at same number of jobs'. Nevertheless, these errors are relatively infrequent and rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the intended comparisons and descriptions without significant difficulty.

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