Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph below demonstrate the information of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.
Overall the percentage of jobs in Manufacturing and in Reatil sector is high as compare to other sectors. However the Agriculture sector is very low in economy but Healthcare sector is moderate in economy.
The manufacturing sector in 1960 had 15 milion jobs, and then it was increased to 20 milions. but on the other hand the Retail sector had 5 milion jobs in 1960 and then it increased to 15 milion jobs in 2020 and manucaturing sector it decreased to 10 miolions in 2020. However the Agriculture sector had 5 milion jobs in 1960 but it decreased to 2 milion jobs in 2020. on other hand the Healthcare sector had 3 milion jobs in 1960 and in the end of graph it increased to 15 milions
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5
The response only partially addresses the prompt, failing to meet the minimum length requirement of 150 words by being 13 words short, with 11 words directly copied from the task prompt. While the student attempts to summarise the main features, the overview is confused, incorrectly referring to percentages instead of absolute numbers of jobs in millions. Key details and data points are inaccurately reported, such as claiming the agriculture sector had 5 million jobs in 1960 when it was actually closer to 6 million, and misstating the 2020 figures for multiple sectors. The information is presented in a limited and under-developed manner, lacking a clear and accurate summary of overall trends.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
There is some basic organisation in the response, but it lacks a clear overall progression. The essay is divided into an introduction, an overview paragraph, and a body section, but the grouping of information is disjointed. Cohesive devices are minimal, repetitive, and often inaccurate, with phrases like 'and then', 'but on the other hand', and 'however' overused or awkwardly placed to link contrasting ideas. Paragraphing is weak, and referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the flow of information smoothly from one point to the next.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is limited and barely adequate for the task, with noticeable errors that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader. There are multiple spelling errors throughout the text, such as 'demonstrate' instead of 'demonstrates', 'Reatil' instead of 'Retail', 'milion' instead of 'million', and 'manucaturing' instead of 'manufacturing'. Word choice is frequently inaccurate, such as referring to data as 'percentages' rather than absolute figures in millions. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary related to economic sectors, but inaccuracies in spelling, word form, and collocation restrict the range.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response demonstrates a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying primarily on simple sentences and basic coordination. Attempts at complex or compound sentences are frequently faulty, leading to run-on structures and missing punctuation. There are frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues like 'The graph below demonstrate', missing articles, and awkward prepositional phrases. Punctuation is poorly controlled, with missing full stops and capitalisation errors at the beginning of sentences, which causes some difficulty for the reader.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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