Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph demonstrates data about the ratio of job opportunities in different sectors in USs economoy from 1960 to 2020.
From an overall perspective, it has been seen that job ratio of retail as well as healthcare showed an upward trend whereas jobs in manufacturing presented a downward trend. On the contrary, amount of jobs in agriculture sector remaind mostly stable throughout the period.
To initiate with retail job field, there was above 6 millions of job in 1960 which gradually increased to above 15 million in 2020. Thereafter, only about 2million job was available in healthcare in 1960 which is the lowest amount amount of job compared to other sectors also showed a rise and reached at a considerable amount of more than 15 million in 2020 .
Turning to manfacturing sector, it illustrated a gradual rise from 15 million to 20 million in 1980 which also the peak amount of job throughout the period then a slight fall occured till 2020 and reached at about 13 million. Lastly, agricultural part started with nearly 6million of job then faced a minute decline at about 4 million in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main features and making relevant comparisons across the four economic sectors. An appropriate overview is provided, highlighting the general upward trends in retail and healthcare, the downward trend in manufacturing, and the stability of agriculture. However, some areas are under-developed or lack specific detail, such as the agricultural sector where data points are slightly imprecise or under-analysed. Overall, the information presented is generally accurate according to the visual data, and the selection of key features is sufficient, placing this criterion at the targeted level.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt to structure the information logically, starting with an introduction and overview, followed by body paragraphs detailing the specific sectors. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical and referencing is occasionally unclear, as seen in awkward transitions like 'To initialise with retail job field' and 'Lastly, agricultural part'. Paragraphing is used, but the internal logical progression within paragraphs could be smoother and more cohesive devices could be managed with greater flexibility to avoid a repetitive structure.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate to communicate the main points of the task, employing terms such as 'upward trend', 'downward trend', and 'considerable amount'. However, there are notable word-choice errors, incorrect collocations, and spelling mistakes that detract from precision, such as 'economoy', 'remaind', 'manfacturing', and 'agricultural part'. The range of vocabulary is limited and attempts at less common items sometimes result in inaccuracies, although communication of the data is generally maintained without significant hindrance.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some control over sentence structures. However, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation, including missing articles ('above 6 millions of job'), subject-verb agreement issues ('amount of jobs in agriculture sector remaind'), and awkward phrasing ('which is the lowest amount amount of job compared to other sectors also showed a rise'). These errors in grammar and punctuation persist throughout the text, though they rarely completely impede communication.
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