Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

This graph illustrates the information about employment rate in the four major sectors of the US economy.

Rise and fall can be seen in the ratio of jobs. The first sector which achieved the highest rank between the rest of sectors is manufacturing. It's figure is around 20 million but in 1980 that is quite old. Furthermore, if we talk about the rest of the sectors then retail sector comes later and almost 15 million jobs in 2000 was recorded. Now, this sector has gained a little rise in 2020 that is around 15 million which shows this sector is more at trending between the rest of three sectors in 2020. However, after these two mojar sectors, healthcare and agriculture comes who did not achieve such a great number. Their's ratio was below 5 million.

In conclusion, this graph overall representing the economic growth in the different sectors of US while comparing the employment ratio.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response only minimally addresses the task. While you mention manufacturing and retail, the coverage of the visual data is very limited and contains inaccuracies, such as stating that manufacturing was around 20 million in 1960 when the graph shows it at 15 million. Furthermore, healthcare and agriculture are dismissed too briefly with inaccurate generalizations like "Their's ratio was below 5 million" (agriculture drops to 2 million, but healthcare reaches 16 million by 2020). The overview sentence at the end is very basic and fails to highlight the key overarching trends, such as the dramatic growth in healthcare and the contrasting decline in agriculture.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organization with an introduction and conclusion, but the overall progression of ideas is lacking. The response is divided into a single large, blocky body paragraph where sentences jump between different sectors without clear logical sequencing. Cohesive devices are either repetitive or inadequate, using weak transitions like "Furthermore, if we talk about the rest..." and "Now, this sector..." which feel conversational and mechanical rather than academic. Paragraphing is not used effectively to separate different sectors or trends, making the flow disjointed and difficult to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is limited and repetitive, with frequent word choice and spelling errors that occasionally impede communication. You use phrases like "employment rate" instead of employment levels or numbers, and invent awkward expressions like "more at trending between the rest of three sectors". There are also noticeable lexical errors such as "mojar sectors" instead of major sectors, and grammatical word-form errors like "Their's ratio". To improve, you need to use a wider range of precise vocabulary related to data trends, such as nouns and verbs describing upward and downward movements.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The range of grammatical structures is very limited, relying mostly on simple sentences with frequent errors that cause difficulty for the reader. There are persistent issues with article usage, prepositions, and subject-verb agreement, such as "It's figure" (possessive error for its), "between the rest of sectors" (incorrect prepositional phrase), and healthcare and agriculture coming "who did not achieve" (incorrect relative pronoun for non-living categories). Attempts at complex sentences often result in awkward or broken syntax. Punctuation is also basic, and control over verb tenses when describing past timeline data is inconsistent.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.