Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the information about the number of employments in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall it can be seen that, the number of employment in different four sectors of the economy. In the middle of the given time period manufacturing were accounted maximum number of jobs and the agriculture were show the least number of jobs in the end of year.

In 1960, 15 millions jobs were provided in the manufacturing sector, while approximately 5 millions jobs were accounted for in the retail sector. In 1980 it reached at the peak and provided 20 millions jobs in manufacturing sector, whereas compared 10 millions jobs were in retail sector. Manufacturimg sector were slightly declined and retail sector were rose in the end of the year.

In other two sector, agriculture were provided more than 5 millions jobs and 3 millions jobs by healthcar sector. Healthcare sector were rose in at the peaked and provided near about 16 millions jobs in the end of the year.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the task partially, attempting to present an overview and select key data points from the graph, though some details are inaccurate or under-developed. While a basic attempt at an overview is made, it is grammatically incomplete and fails to clearly capture the main trends across all four sectors. Key features are mentioned, such as the peak of manufacturing in 1980 and the upward trend in healthcare and retail, but the reporting of figures contains inaccuracies—for instance, stating that healthcare started at 3 million and agriculture provided 'more than 5 millions' when the visual data shows agriculture at 6 million in 1960. Additionally, the final sentence of the third paragraph is confusing and lacks clarity. To move to a higher band, the overview needs to be fully formed and clearly state the overall trends, and the data cited must accurately reflect the visual information without contradictions.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response shows some organization with an attempted paragraph structure separating the introduction, overview, and body details, but there is no clear overall progression of ideas. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or repetitively, such as the abrupt transitions ('In other two sector...') and misuse of connectors. Paragraphing is attempted, but the grouping of ideas lacks logical cohesion, as the final paragraph mixes disparate sectors without a clear comparative framework. Referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the flow of information. To achieve a higher band, the writer must ensure a logical sequence of information from start to finish, use cohesive devices more naturally, and group details into well-defined paragraphs that compare related trends effectively.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The lexical range is limited and minimally adequate for the task, with noticeable errors in word choice, word form, and collocation that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader. The student frequently misuses vocabulary, such as writing 'employments' instead of 'employment' or 'jobs', 'Manufacturimg' (spelling error), and awkward phrases like 'compared 10 millions jobs'. Attempts to use less common vocabulary often result in unnatural phrasing, such as 'reached at the peak' or 'healthcare sector were rose in at the peaked'. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey a basic outline of the graph, these recurring inaccuracies restrict the response. To improve, the student should focus on learning correct collocations for describing data trends, such as 'reached a peak' or 'experienced a slight decline', and ensure accurate word forms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response demonstrates a limited range of structures, relying mostly on simple sentences alongside frequent errors when attempting more complex constructions. There are persistent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('manufacturing were accounted', 'agriculture were show', 'agriculture were provided'), incorrect passive and active voice pairings ('sector were rose'), and prepositional errors ('in the end of year'). Punctuation is also basic, and structural errors occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, such as incomplete clauses or dangling modifiers. To reach the next band, the writer needs to eliminate frequent basic errors, improve control over verb tenses and voices when reporting statistical data, and produce a higher proportion of error-free complex sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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