Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph illustrated information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. Overall, the earlist Healthcare jobs was lower, but every year they rosed up. On the other hand, the Agriculture, sector was high in starting. However, they was gradually lower at the end.
we can see that Manufacturing sector jobs was at the top position in 1960 at 15 million, it rosed up every year and reached at the top, at 20 million. However, it gradually low every year. In 2020, it was just 13 millions approximately. Retail sector jobs started 6 million but it rosed up every year single year and reached 15 million. In 2020, Healthcare and Retail jobs sector postioned was same. Agriculture jobs sector was approximately 6 million in 1960. It steadily ar low every year and the last they was at the lower point as comapred to other sectors.
The earlist Healthcare jobs was lower in 1960, but every year they rose up and reached approximately 15 million.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses the task partially by reporting on the general trends and some specific data points from the chart, such as mentioning that manufacturing jobs started at 15 million in 1960. However, the data handling contains inaccuracies, such as stating that healthcare and retail jobs had the same position in 2020 when the chart shows them both at approximately 16 million, and incorrectly claiming that agriculture jobs were high at the start when they were actually starting at a much lower point relative to manufacturing. The overview is weak, with repetitive statements that do not fully capture the overall shifts across all four sectors. Ideas are presented with limited development, and several data points are misread or confused, restricting the effectiveness of the report.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0
The organization of the text lacks clear overall progression and logical sequencing. The response is fragmented into short, disjointed sentences and repetitive paragraphs, such as repeating the point about healthcare jobs at the beginning and the end of the essay. Cohesive devices are either missing, inadequate, or repetitive, with excessive reliance on transitional phrases like 'However' and 'On the other hand' used mechanically rather than logically. Paragraphing is poorly handled, as ideas about different sectors are scattered randomly throughout the text without grouping related trends together, making the overall flow difficult to follow.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is limited and repetitive, with basic lexical items such as 'jobs', 'sector', 'economy', 'high', and 'low'. There are noticeable lexical and word-form errors, including 'earlist' instead of 'earliest', 'rosed up' instead of 'rose' or 'increased', 'gradually low' instead of 'gradually declined', and 'postioned' instead of 'positioned'. These inaccuracies and awkward word choices occasionally cause difficulty for the reader and show a lack of control over less common vocabulary. Spelling mistakes and non-standard collocations further restrict the effectiveness of the lexical range.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The grammatical range is very limited, relying predominantly on simple sentences and basic structures. Attempts at complex sentences or describing trends frequently result in faulty structures and persistent errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('every year they rosed up', 'they was gradually lower', 'sector jobs was at the top', 'they was at the lower point'). Punctuation and article usage are also inconsistent throughout the text. These frequent errors across basic and complex sentence forms cause noticeable difficulty and strain for the reader.
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