Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In 1960,s US economy offers job in this following sectors this data follow in this Sectors

In Manufacturing Sectors US provide 15 Millions Jobs in 1960. and it is increase in 1980 20 Millions job and also Decreass in 2000 and 2020. The Camparison Between 1960 and 2020 in Manufacturing Sector US losee Jobs In this Sector.

In Retail Sectors US provide 7 Millions Jobs in 1960. and in 2020 Retail Sectors Increase By 16 Million Jobs.

In Agricultures Sectors US provide 7 Millions Jobs in 1960. The Camparison Between 1960 and 2020 in Agricultures Sector US losee Jobs In this Sector.

In Healthcare Sectors US provide 2.2 Millions Jobs in 1960. and in 2020 Heatcare Sectors Increase By 16 Million Jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response addresses the task only minimally and fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, stopping at 122 words. While the student attempts to report some data from the chart, such as the 15 million jobs in manufacturing in 1960, there are significant inaccuracies in data transcription and reporting. For example, the student claims that retail and agriculture had 7 million jobs in 1960 when the graph shows 6 million for retail and agriculture. Furthermore, there is no overall summary or overview provided, which is essential for achieving a higher band in Academic Task 1. The focus is narrow and the details are minimal.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

Information and ideas are not arranged coherently. The text relies heavily on repetitive sentence structures such as 'In [Sector] Sectors US provide...' which results in a mechanical and disjointed progression. There is a lack of logical paragraphing, and the use of cohesive devices is virtually non-existent, making it difficult for the reader to follow a clear overall organization. Reference words are used poorly, and transitions between ideas are abrupt, reflecting characteristics of the lower bands.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with frequent errors in word choice, word form, and spelling that occasionally strain the reader. Examples of lexical errors include 'Decreass' instead of decrease, 'losees' or 'losee' instead of lose, and 'Heatcare' instead of healthcare. The range of vocabulary is limited to simple terms related to the prompt, and attempts at less common lexical items are absent or inaccurate, placing the response firmly in the lower band range.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The grammar is characterized by a very limited range of structures and frequent errors. There are persistent issues with subject-verb agreement and tense consistency, such as 'US economy offers job in this following sectors this data follow' and 'it is increase in 1980 20 Millions job and also Decreass'. Punctuation is also problematic, with random periods placed mid-sentence, and articles are frequently misused or omitted. These frequent errors can cause difficulty for the reader and reflect a lack of control over basic sentence forms.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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