Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph depicts the information about the number of jobs in Manufacturing, Retail, Agricilture and Healthcare feilds in United States from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, there are plenty of jobs related to manufacturing feild and agriculture is showing a downward graph.

In 1960, jobs in manfucaturing feild were about 15 million where it employment rate increased and reached its peak during the next 2 decades with 20 million. Later it fall to approximately 17 million in 2000 and it futher decline even more in 2020 about less than 15 million. Healthcare feild has a sharp growth in 1960 the jobs were nealy 3 million and reached to 5 million by 1980 and attained a sharp peak by 2020 with almost more than 15 million.

Retail jobs increased slightly from 5 million to over the 15 million in the given time period. It has a tremendous increament in jobs it is more than 5 million intially and doubled its figure in 1980 and 2000 and reached to more than 15 million by 2020. In contrary, agriculture has a drastic declined graph from 5 million to approximately 2 million by the end. It dropped to nearly 3 million in 1980 and maintained a steady graph till 2000 and falled gradually to less than 3 million by 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by selecting and reporting the main features of the four sectors across the given period, including relevant comparisons. An overview is attempted, noting that manufacturing had plenty of jobs and agriculture experienced a downward trend. However, some areas are under-developed or contain inaccuracies in data reporting; for example, the statement that healthcare jobs were nearly 3 million in 1960 does not accurately reflect the graph, which shows them starting at around 2 million. Similarly, some descriptions of trends, such as retail and agriculture, mix up specific figures or repeat information inconsistently across paragraphs. To reach a higher band, all key data points should be reported with greater precision and the overview should more comprehensively cover all major trends present in the visual data.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall arrangement and attempts a logical progression by grouping data into introductory, overview, and body paragraphs. However, paragraphing and referencing are sometimes faulty or mechanical. For instance, the overview is brief and separated awkwardly, and body paragraphs bundle multiple sectors together without clear transitional flow. Cohesive devices like 'Later', 'In contrary', and 'It' are used, but referencing is occasionally unclear, making it difficult to determine whether the pronoun refers to jobs, a specific sector, or a year. To improve, the writer should ensure each paragraph has a distinct thematic focus, enhance logical links between sentences, and use cohesive devices more naturally without over-reliance on repetitive transition words.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The lexical range used is adequate for the task, successfully attempting less common vocabulary such as 'downward graph', 'employment rate', 'tremendous increament', and 'drastic declined graph'. However, there are noticeable spelling and word-choice errors throughout the text, including 'Agricilture', 'feilds', 'manfucaturing', 'futher', 'nealy', 'increament', and 'In contrary'. These errors stem from frequent spelling slips and minor inaccuracies in collocation and word form. While these issues do not entirely impede communication, they restrict the lexical score. To achieve a higher band, the writer must eliminate spelling mistakes and demonstrate greater control over less common lexical items and standard academic collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures like 'where it employment rate increased and reached its peak' and 'It has a tremendous increament in jobs it is more than 5 million intially'. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, such as tense inconsistencies (e.g., mixing past and present tenses like 'depicts' with 'fall' and 'falled'), missing articles ('in United States'), and run-on sentences with comma splices. Despite these issues, the errors rarely impede communication and the meaning remains clear. To move to a higher band, the writer needs to increase the proportion of error-free complex sentences, maintain consistent past tense when reporting historical data, and improve punctuation control.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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