Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 7.0)

The line graph demonstrates the number of occupations in four different economic sectors, manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, it is clear that healthcare and retail sectors witnessed an upward trend, whereas manufacturing and agriculture sectors showed an overall decline.

To begin with, in 1960 healthcare sector stood at approximately 2 million. By 1980 it increased steadily and accounted for 5 million of jobs. Between 1980 and 2020 healthcare jobs grew considerably and recorded more than 15 million. In terms of retail sector, it began from just over than 5 million jobs in 1960. In 2000 this figure experienced a significant growth and constituted 15 million. In addition in 2020 the number of jobs in retail sector equaled to healthcare sector.

In contrast, the number of jobs in manufacturing and agriculture sectors went down. In 1960 manufacturing sector was at 15 million of jobs. In the following 20 years it hit a peak and comprised 20 million; however by 2020 this figure fell gradually and became around 13 million. With regard to agriculture, this sector registered just over 5 million jobs, but it dropped moderately and in 1980 and 2020 stood at about 3 million and 2 million respectively.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.5

The response satisfies the requirements for Task Achievement by addressing all parts of the prompt. You successfully report the main features of the four economic sectors in the US from 1960 to 2020 and provide a clear, concise overview statement right at the beginning. Key trends are well-selected and supported with specific data points, such as manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 and healthcare growing to more than 15 million by 2020. However, the response sits at this level rather than a higher one because certain comparisons could be sharper, and the data for retail in 2020 is described indirectly by stating it equaled healthcare rather than explicitly citing the final figure of 16 million. Overall, your reporting is accurate and covers all trends effectively.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The essay demonstrates a clear, logical organisation and progression throughout. You make effective use of paragraphing, separating the introduction, the overview, the upward trends, and the downward trends into distinct blocks. Cohesive devices are employed reasonably well to link ideas, such as 'Overall', 'To begin with', and 'In contrast'. Referencing is generally clear, guiding the reader smoothly from one decade to the next. The response does not reach the higher band because some cohesive links feel slightly formulaic or mechanical, and occasional transitions between data points could flow more naturally without relying solely on chronological listings. Nevertheless, the overall arrangement is coherent and easy to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms related to data trends such as 'upward trend', 'increase steadily', 'grow considerably', and 'fall gradually'. There are successful attempts to use less common vocabulary like 'constituted' and 'comprised'. However, the vocabulary profile is held back by minor lexical inaccuracies and awkward phrasing, such as 'equaled to healthcare sector' (which should be 'equaled that of the healthcare sector') and 'began from just over than 5 million' (where 'than' is unnecessary). Furthermore, repeating basic reporting verbs limits your lexical flexibility. These minor errors do not impede communication, but they prevent the writing from achieving a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and time-phrase introductions effectively. There are a number of error-free sentences demonstrating good control over past tense narrative structures for historical data. However, occasional grammatical errors persist, such as missing prepositions or articles (e.g., 'in 1960 healthcare sector' needs 'the healthcare sector', and 'accounted for 5 million of jobs' should be 'accounted for 5 million jobs'). Punctuation is generally fine, but occasional comma splices or missing commas after introductory adverbial phrases occur (e.g., 'In addition in 2020'). These errors are infrequent and rarely impede communication, reflecting solid control while keeping the response at this band.

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