Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
This line raph shows the sector of employement jobs in Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, Healthcare, in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, the manufacturing had the most bigest number of jobs for most of the period, although it declined considerably after 1980. In contrast, healthcare and retail generally increased and agriculture experienced a significant decline.
In 1960, manufacturing provided about 15 million jobs, making the largest sector. This figure rose to approximately 19 million in 1980, before falling to around 15 million in 2000 and just over 10 million in 2020.
Agriculture showed the opposite trend. It had around 6 million jobs in 1960, but this role 2 million in 1980. It then decreased furthur to roughly 1 million in 2000 and almost zero in 2020. Finally, healthcare increased consistently throughout the period . It begin with only about 2 million jopbs in 1960 and the rose to around 4 million in 1980, nearly 9 million in 2000, and approximately 14 million in 2020. Thus, healthcare became one of the largest employement sectors by the end of the period.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response covers all four sectors of the economy and attempts to outline key trends and figures across the given timeframe. However, the development of ideas is uneven, and some data points are inaccurate or poorly supported, such as stating agriculture 'role 2 million in 1980' and then citing 'roughly 1 million in 2000' which misrepresents the chart's actual trajectory. While an overview is present, the specific details lack the thoroughness and precision needed for a higher band, as several figures contain notable inaccuracies when compared to the visual reference. The information is presented partially, with some features under-developed.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response maintains an overall coherent arrangement and follows a logical structure by grouping information into an introduction, an overview paragraph, and body paragraphs detailing specific sectors. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate ideas. However, cohesion is at times mechanical or faulty, such as in the transition 'Finally, healthcare increased consistently throughout the period . It begin with only about 2 million jopbs...' and referencing is not always completely clear. Transitional markers like 'In contrast' and 'It then decreased' are used, but their mechanical deployment prevents the essay from achieving a fully smooth and natural progression.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The lexical range is adequate for the task, allowing the student to communicate basic trends using terms like 'sector', 'decline', and 'increase'. However, there are noticeable vocabulary and spelling errors, such as 'raph' instead of 'graph', 'employement', 'bigest', 'role' instead of 'rose', and 'furthur'. The student attempts some less common vocabulary items like 'considerably' and 'significantly', but inaccuracies in word form and choice, along with spelling mistakes, impede precision and occasionally affect readability.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as 'Overall, the manufacturing had the most bigest number of jobs for most of the period, although it declined considerably after 1980.' There are frequent errors in tense usage, article selection, and prepositional patterns, including 'It begin with only' (tense error) and missing articles before sectoral descriptions. While these grammatical errors do not completely impede communication, their frequency across complex structures limits the control of grammar and punctuation, keeping the response firmly at this level.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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