Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four several divisions of the economy, manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it is evident that manufacturing experienced the higest jobs in first and agriculture experienced the lowest jobs over the time.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

The response identifies the graph’s subject and gives a brief overall statement, noting that manufacturing was highest initially and agriculture was the lowest. However, it does not summarise the main changes across the period: there are no figures, comparisons between the other sectors, or account of how manufacturing declined while retail and healthcare rose. The overview is also too broad to capture the important ending, when retail and healthcare were joint highest. The response is substantially below the required 150 words, leaving the task largely incomplete. To improve, add an overview of the contrasting trends and support it with selected figures from the graph, such as manufacturing peaking at about 20 million in 1980 and healthcare rising to around 16 million by 2020.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic, understandable sequence: an opening sentence identifies the graph, followed by an overview introduced with “Overall”. This gives the response a minimal structure, and the ideas are related to the task. However, the response ends after these two sentences, so it does not develop into a logically organised summary with paragraphs or a progression through the main trends. The overview also combines two observations without explaining their relationship or comparing the sectors at the end of the period. Build a clear structure with an introduction, an overview, and one or two paragraphs grouping the rising and falling sectors. Use simple links such as “By contrast” and “Meanwhile” to make comparisons explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some relevant vocabulary, including “line graph”, “number of jobs”, and the four sector names, so the topic is generally clear. However, the range is very limited, and several choices are inaccurate or unnatural: “four several divisions” is contradictory, “experienced the higest jobs” is not a natural collocation, and “the lowest jobs” is also awkward. The spelling of “highest” is incorrect. These issues make the description less precise, although the intended meaning can still be understood. Use standard chart language such as “employment”, “the number of people employed”, “rose”, “fell”, “peaked”, and “remained the smallest sector” to describe the data accurately.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response contains two complete sentences, and the opening sentence uses a list of sector names to convey the graph’s subject. However, the grammatical range is narrow, with no developed comparisons or varied sentence patterns. In the overview, “manufacturing experienced the higest jobs in first” has an unclear and faulty structure; a clearer form would be “Manufacturing had the highest employment at the beginning of the period.” The phrase “agriculture experienced the lowest jobs over the time” also needs a more accurate grammatical construction, such as “Agriculture had the fewest jobs throughout the period.” Practise forming accurate comparative sentences and using time expressions with appropriate articles and prepositions.

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