Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph illustrates the data about number of jobs economy. namely, manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the United States from 1960 to 2020.

Overall graph shows the hightest numbers of jobs of manufacturing that was high in 1960 but fell down over the given period of time in 2020.

While the lowest number of jobs was agriculture by 6% in 1960 but with time it also fell down in 2020 which reached by 3%.

The second sector of the economy is retail that is 6% in 1960 but it gradually increased with time and in 2020 it rised by 16%.

In 1960, the healthcare was about 3% while it rised in 1980 by 5% and in 2020 heathcare and retail had the highest number of jobs in economy by 16% instead of other two sectors.

While,on the other side, agriculture had 6% numbe of jobs it it fell down in 2020 at 3%.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify all four sectors and make relevant comparisons, including the broad rise in retail and healthcare and the decline in agriculture. However, the report only partially captures the main features and contains important inaccuracies. Manufacturing peaked at about 20 million in 1980, not in 1960, and healthcare rose to around 16 million by 2020, rather than being about 3 million in 1960. Agriculture fell to roughly 2 million in 2020, not 3 million. The overview also misses the key change in ranking: manufacturing led initially, while retail and healthcare were joint leaders at the end. Select the most important trends, report figures accurately, and avoid repeating the same agriculture point.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has some organisation: it introduces the graph, gives an overall statement, and then discusses sectors. This gives the reader a basic route through the information. However, progression is weak because the paragraphs are not clearly separated and the sector-by-sector details are not grouped or ordered consistently. The repeated agriculture comparison at the end adds no new information, while connectors such as “While” and “on the other side” are used awkwardly and do not clearly show the relationship between ideas. Use a distinct introduction, overview, and two detail paragraphs, grouping related trends—for example, the rising sectors together and the declining sectors together—and use linking phrases only where they clarify comparisons.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant task vocabulary, including “manufacturing,” “gradually increased,” “fell down,” and “highest number of jobs,” so the topic is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several choices are inaccurate or unnatural. Repeated use of “fell down” and “rised” weakens the description, while “6%” is incorrect because the chart reports jobs in millions, not percentages. There are also spelling errors such as “hightest,” “heathcare,” and “numbe.” Aim for precise chart language and vary verbs for trends, such as “declined,” “rose,” and “reached.” Check spelling and use “million jobs” when giving figures.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a few complex structures, including “While the lowest number of jobs was agriculture…” and “but with time it also fell down,” but these are often faulty or incomplete. For example, “Overall graph shows” is missing an article, and “the highest numbers of jobs of manufacturing that was high” has an unclear structure and agreement. Several sentences join contrasting ideas without reliable punctuation, as in “In 1960, the healthcare was about 3% while it rised…” The repeated use of “it” also makes references unclear. Build shorter, complete sentences first, then add controlled comparisons using forms such as “whereas” or “while.” Check articles, subject–verb agreement, and past-tense forms before submitting.

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