Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph displays the data about the number of jobs in four different sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it is evident that the highest number of jobs was recorded in 1980 in manufacturing, whereas the lowest number of employment recorded in 2020, which was in the agriculture sector.

To begin with, in the year 1960, 15 million jobs were available in manufacturing, which increased to 20 million in 1980. After that, over the years, the number decreased and reached to nearly 12.5 million in 2020. Moreover, in the retail sector, 6 million jobs were recorded, which rose significantly over 4 decades, reaching 15 million in 2000. It rose slightly over the next 20 years and reached approximately 16 million in 2020.

Furthermore, turning to the agriculture sector, over the years the number of jobs declined from 6 million in 1960 to nearly 3 million in 2020. In the healthcare sector, jobs increased over the years. In 1960, only 2 million jobs were available, which rose to nearly 16 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main overall pattern that manufacturing peaked in 1980 and agriculture was the smallest sector by 2020, and you give relevant figures for manufacturing, retail and healthcare. However, the overview is incomplete: it does not mention that retail and healthcare both rose substantially, or that healthcare caught up with retail by 2020. Some details are also inaccurate or missing. Agriculture fell to about 3 million by 1980 and remained near that level in 2000 before dropping to about 2 million in 2020; your account instead suggests a steady decline to 3 million. Manufacturing ended at about 13 million, rather than 12.5 million. Include these key stages and comparisons to make the summary more complete and precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a clear basic structure: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs describing the sectors. Sequencing phrases such as “To begin with” and “Furthermore” help signal the shift between groups, and the information is generally easy to follow. However, the progression is somewhat mechanical, and the overview does not prepare the reader for all the comparisons developed later. The agriculture and healthcare details are compressed into a short final paragraph, while the manufacturing and retail trends receive more attention. Grouping sectors by contrasting trends, and using clearer links between them—for example, noting that healthcare rose to match retail in 2020—would create a more balanced and connected account.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “increased,” “declined,” “rose significantly,” and “reaching,” so the main trends are communicated clearly. There is also some variation in how you describe changes. At times, however, wording is repetitive or imprecise: “jobs were available” and “jobs were recorded” recur, and “the lowest number of employment” is an awkward expression. “Reached to” is also an unsuitable collocation in “reached to nearly 12.5 million.” Choose more precise chart language and vary the nouns and verbs—for example, “employment stood at” or “the figure climbed to.” These refinements would make the description more natural and exact.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple statements and longer complex sentences, including relative clauses such as “which increased to 20 million in 1980” and time clauses such as “over the next 20 years.” Most sentences remain understandable, and the past tense is generally appropriate for the historical data. Some grammatical errors remain, including the incomplete construction “the lowest number of employment recorded in 2020,” which needs a verb such as “was,” and “reached to nearly 12.5 million,” where “reached” should not take “to.” The overview sentence also shifts awkwardly between “was recorded” and “which was.” Check sentence completeness and verb patterns while retaining your varied sentence structures.

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