Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illastrate the number of jobs in four different sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.

From the graph we can see that in manufacturing sector the jobs ratio is high for a certain years like from 1970 to 1990 and after that it goes down compare to how it start in 1960, next if you see the healthcare jobs sector grow contineously started from 1960 to 2020 while agriculture sector drom and going steady without approvement. next come the retail sector, from the graph we can see that retail jobs sector are also growing from start till 2000 and than goes slowly.

Overall the healthcare jobs in millions going very well along with retail sectors while the agriculture goes badly down along wth manufacturing but still manufacturing sectors have some ups in start, we can conclude that healthcare are very fast and growing jobs sector in US from 1960 till 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and describe several broad trends, including healthcare’s rise and agriculture’s decline. However, the account only partially reports the main features: it gives no clear overview of the relative positions at the end, and some details are inaccurate or vague. Manufacturing peaks at about 20 million in 1980, not during “1970 to 1990,” and falls to around 13 million by 2020. Retail continues to rise slightly after 2000, rather than simply “goes slowly,” while healthcare reaches about 16 million and is level with retail in 2020. The comparison that manufacturing and agriculture both go “badly down” also obscures their very different scales. Select key figures and state the main comparisons more precisely.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response follows a generally understandable order: it introduces the graph, discusses the sectors, and ends with an overall comment. This gives the reader some sense of organisation. However, the progression is weakened by long, loosely connected sentences and repeated sequencing words such as “next” and “next come.” The second paragraph combines several trends in one sentence, making the comparisons difficult to follow, and the final “Overall” repeats earlier points rather than providing a concise, distinct overview. Use separate paragraphs for the overview and key details, and group related sectors—for example, the rising healthcare and retail trends together, then the declining agriculture trend and manufacturing’s rise and fall. Clearer sentence boundaries and more precise linking would improve cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “grow,” “goes down,” “steady,” and “growing,” so the general subject is usually clear. However, the range is limited and several expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “jobs ratio is high,” “going very well,” and “without approvement.” Repetition of “jobs sector” and “growing” also limits precision. There are noticeable spelling errors, including “illastrate,” “contineously,” “drom,” and “wth,” which reduce the accuracy and polish of the report. Build a more reliable set of chart-description terms and use them precisely: for example, describe a figure as rising, declining, remaining stable, or reaching a peak, rather than using general evaluative phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to connect ideas in longer sentences, but the range of sentence structures is limited and these attempts often contain errors that make the relationships between ideas unclear. For example, “the healthcare jobs sector grow contineously started from 1960 to 2020” lacks correct verb forms and a clear sentence structure, while “the agriculture goes badly down along wth manufacturing” has problems with agreement and sentence construction. There are also inconsistent tense forms and missing articles or plural markers, as in “in manufacturing sector” and “retail jobs sector are.” Punctuation is also weak: several independent ideas are joined with commas or run together. Practise writing shorter, complete sentences first, then add accurate clauses to compare trends.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.