Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrate the number of jobs in four sectors of the US economy between 1960 and 2020.

OVERVIEW=OVERALL The number of jobs in manufacturing increased initially before declining while employment in retail and healthcare generally rose throughout te period.In contrast ;agricultre experienced an overall decrease in the no of jobs.

'' In 1960,around 35 million people were employed in the manufacturing sector, while the figure for retail was approximately 20 million. Manufacturing employment then rose to a peak of about 40 million in 1980 before falling gradually to around 25 million in 2020.in contrast, employment in retail increased steadily reaching approximately 35 million by 2020.

''Healthcare employment also increased significantly rising from approximately 10 million jobs in 1960to around 30 million in 2020. By contrast 'agriculture showed a downword trend overall; fallling from about 15 million jobs in 1960to approximately 5 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response identifies the broad pattern that manufacturing rose and then fell, retail and healthcare increased, and agriculture declined. However, the figures are substantially inaccurate: for example, manufacturing began at about 15 million, not 35 million, and peaked at 20 million, not 40 million; retail started at about 6 million, not 20 million. These errors affect the central comparisons and make the account an unreliable summary of the graph. The overview is relevant, but the supporting details do not accurately report the data, and the response is also below the required 150 words (137 words; nine words copied from the prompt are excluded). To improve, check each series against the graph and include accurate key values and comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs describing the trends. It also uses contrast markers such as “while” and “By contrast” to distinguish the sectors, so the reader can follow the intended comparisons. However, the overview and detail paragraphs are not clearly separated by consistent formatting, and the quotation marks and “OVERVIEW=OVERALL” label interrupt the presentation. Some transitions are mechanically inserted, and missing spaces after full stops—for example, “period.In contrast” and “2020.in contrast”—make the progression less smooth. Keep the paragraph structure, remove drafting labels and stray quotation marks, and use punctuation and linking phrases consistently.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

There is enough topic vocabulary to communicate the main trends, including “peak,” “increased steadily,” “declining,” and “downward trend.” The response also varies its descriptions rather than repeating one verb throughout. However, spelling and word-form errors are noticeable, including “te period,” “agricultre,” “fallling,” and “downword.” Informal shorthand such as “no of jobs” is unsuitable for an academic report, while “people were employed” is less precise than describing the number of jobs. These issues reduce accuracy and polish, although the intended meaning is generally recoverable. Use standard spelling and formal, precise expressions such as “the number of jobs” and “employment stood at.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response attempts a mix of simple and complex structures. For example, “Manufacturing employment then rose to a peak … before falling” uses a clear sequence, and the overview contrasts several trends in one sentence. Some sentence patterns are effective, but errors in sentence boundaries, spacing, and punctuation recur: “period.In contrast” and “2020.in contrast” should be separated correctly, and the opening sentence needs subject–verb agreement (“The line graph illustrates”). The overview also has awkward punctuation around “In contrast,” and the final details would benefit from consistently formed sentences. These errors do not usually prevent understanding, but they limit control. Proofread agreement, sentence boundaries, and punctuation, while retaining the attempted complex structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.