Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line chart depicts the information about the number of jobs in four different sectors namely manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it is evident that retail and healthcare related jobs increased considerably over the period, while agriculture business went down gradually.

In 1960, around 15 million jobs provided by manufacturing sector, while 6 millions jobs by retail and agriculture. Whereas, healthcare gave apporoximately 2.5 million jobs. By 1980, retail and helathcare sectors rose sharply, at 10 million and 5 million jobs, respectively. Subsequently, manufacturing jobs also jumped from 15 million to 20 million. In contrast, agriculture was declined under 5 million and it had remained unchanged until 2020.

Furthermore, manufacturing jobs fell considerably from 1980 to 2020, reached around 12 millions, while retail sector grew considerably in 2000, stood at 15 million jobs, after that it became platue from 2000 to 2020. In the terms of healthcare, the number of jobs rose significantly thoughout the period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main overall contrast accurately: retail and healthcare rise, while agriculture declines, and you report several key figures, including manufacturing’s peak of 20 million in 1980 and retail’s 15 million in 2000. This gives the response a relevant overview and covers the main series. Some features, however, are less fully reported: healthcare’s rise to about 16 million by 2020 is not stated, and the claim that retail “became platue” after 2000 misses its further increase to around 16 million. Agriculture is described as unchanged until 2020, although it falls from about 3 million to 2 million. More precise coverage of these final values and comparisons would make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs describing the figures over time. Sequencing expressions such as “By 1980,” “Subsequently,” and “Furthermore” help the reader follow the timeline, and the main comparisons are generally easy to locate. However, the progression is not always smooth: the final paragraph moves between manufacturing, retail, and healthcare without giving healthcare’s endpoint, and “In the terms of healthcare” is an awkward transition. Some linking is mechanical, particularly the repeated use of “while” and “considerably.” Grouping the series more consistently—for example, contrasting the declining sectors with the rising ones—and using clearer references would strengthen cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “rose sharply,” “fell considerably,” “remained unchanged,” and “stood at,” which helps describe trends and figures. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “depicts” and “evident.” However, some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or imprecise: “agriculture business went down” is less suitable than describing employment in the sector, and “became platue” does not clearly express the slight continued rise in retail jobs. Spelling errors such as “helathcare,” “apporoximately,” and “thoughout” also reduce accuracy. Aim for precise trend language and check spelling, especially for key terms and repeated vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex forms, including the overview clause “while agriculture business went down gradually” and time-linked sentences beginning “By 1980” and “In contrast.” The meaning is generally understandable, but some grammatical errors remain. For example, “15 million jobs provided by manufacturing sector” lacks a finite verb and an article; “6 millions jobs” has an incorrect plural; and “agriculture was declined” uses an incorrect passive form. The sentence beginning “Furthermore” also has an unclear structure around “fell considerably … reached around 12 millions.” Use complete clauses, check subject–verb patterns and articles, and make sure each comparison has a clear grammatical structure. Greater accuracy in these areas would improve control.

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