Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The line graph illustrates the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, employment in manufacturing has increased dramatically and reached up to since 1980. In contrast, the agriculture and healthcare has also been declined, while the jobs in retail experienced increase in number.

In 1960, manufacturing is one of the most important sector of economy in US which then gradually decreased by 16 millions by year 2000. Retail followed the different pattern as it get increased constantly and reached to 16 millions by 2020. However, the employment in agriculture sector declined by 4 millions at first and then gradually declined to 3 millions by 2020.

The number of jobs in retail and healthcare has been increased in year 1980, and then gradually rise by 2000. One of the most important growth is seen on the retail sector whereas, the downfall has been seen in agriculture by 1980.

Overall, the graph shows that the highest rise has been found in retail and the lowest is in agriculture sector.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the four sectors and make some relevant comparisons, including retail’s rise to 16 million jobs and agriculture’s decline. However, the overview contains major inaccuracies: manufacturing did not increase after 1980, and healthcare did not decline; both statements reverse the graph’s trends. The report also gives incorrect or unclear figures, such as manufacturing falling to 16 million by 2000 (the chart shows about 17 million) and agriculture reaching 3 million by 2020 (about 2 million). Important features are therefore only minimally reported, and the final claim that retail had the “highest rise” is not clearly supported, since healthcare also rose substantially. Focus on an accurate overview and select a few reliable comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has separate paragraphs and attempts an overview followed by details, so the reader can recognise a basic report structure. However, the information does not progress clearly: the second paragraph gives an overview, the next two repeat retail and agriculture trends, and the final paragraph restates a general conclusion. Some links are confusing or contradictory, particularly “In contrast” followed by claims that agriculture and healthcare both declined, and “However” before the agriculture figures. The repeated use of “Overall” also makes the organisation feel repetitive. Grouping the trends more logically—for example, rising sectors together and declining sectors together—and using accurate, purposeful linking would make the report easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a basic range of topic vocabulary, including “employment,” “sector,” “declined,” and “constantly,” and the reader can generally identify the subject of each sentence. There are also attempts at more formal reporting language, such as “illustrates” and “experienced increase.” However, several expressions are imprecise or awkward, including “reached up to,” “get increased,” and “the highest rise has been found.” Repetition of “increased,” “declined,” and “sector” limits flexibility, while “downfall” is not a natural choice for a fall in job numbers. Aim for accurate collocations such as “rose to,” “fell to,” and “employment in manufacturing,” and vary trend verbs where appropriate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, and some basic sentence patterns communicate the intended comparisons. However, errors are frequent, and several sentences contain faulty verb forms or agreement. For example, “manufacturing has increased … and reached up to since 1980” is incomplete, while “agriculture and healthcare has also been declined” has agreement and verb-form problems. Tense control is also inconsistent in “manufacturing is” and “it get increased,” and articles and plurals are often missing, as in “one of the most important sector.” These errors sometimes make the trend difficult to understand. Practise past-tense descriptions of completed chart periods and check subject–verb agreement, articles, and complete sentence construction.

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