Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The chart illustrates the number of jobs in four different fields of the economy in the US ranging from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, there are 4 different kinds of sectors of the economy provided that is Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare. Moving ahead, Manufacturing with 15 number of jobs has highest starting in year1960 whereas, Healthcare with almost 2 jobs has the lowest start. Moreover, Agriculture and Retail both start with 6 number of jobs.

It can be demonstrated from the chart that Agriculture which started with 6 number of jobs gradually declined over year 1980, 2000 and 2020 with just 2-3 number of jobs. Furthermore, Healthcare saw a rise in number of jobs from 2 in 1960 to16 jobs in 2020. Retail, on the other hand also rises from 6 jobs in 1960 to 16 jobs in 2020. Lastly, Manufacturing which started with the highest number of jobs in 1960 sees a positive upward with 20 jobs in 1980 which then gradually declines to 17 in 2000 and 13 in 2020.

Thus, the chart helps to understand trend of jobs over year [redacted phone] in the US.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You cover all four sectors and report the main overall movements: manufacturing peaks in 1980 before declining, agriculture falls, and retail and healthcare rise. The figures you give are generally consistent with the chart, including manufacturing’s 15-to-20-to-13 pattern and the two sectors reaching about 16 jobs by 2020. However, the overview is not clearly separated from the details and focuses partly on starting values rather than summarising the key end-point comparison: retail and healthcare finish joint highest, while agriculture is lowest. The account of retail also omits its rise through 2000, and the agriculture figures are given as a broad range rather than clearly identifying the stages. A sharper overview and more selective comparisons would make the main features clearer and better developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable sequence: an introduction, an overview-like paragraph, a body describing the trends, and a brief closing sentence. Linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “on the other hand,” and “Lastly” help signal relationships between sectors. However, the overview paragraph mixes a list of categories with starting figures, while the final “Thus” sentence repeats the general purpose rather than adding a useful comparison. Some transitions feel mechanical, and the reader has to infer the most important overall pattern from details spread across the response. Grouping the rising sectors together and contrasting them with the declining sectors would create clearer progression. Use cohesive devices to show comparisons and stages, rather than relying mainly on sequencing phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for describing a line graph, including “declined,” “rise,” “highest,” and “lowest,” and the meaning is generally understandable. There is some repetition of “number of jobs” and “started,” however, and several expressions are unnatural or imprecise for this task, such as “positive upward,” “highest starting,” and “trend of jobs over year.” These choices make the description less fluent and occasionally obscure the intended comparison. Aim for more precise collocations such as “reached a peak,” “fell to,” “increased steadily,” and “employment in the sector.” Also use “jobs” or “million jobs” consistently rather than treating the figures as a number of jobs without a clear unit.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including contrast structures such as “Retail, on the other hand…” and a relative clause beginning “Agriculture which started…”. The main trends remain understandable, but some errors in sentence construction and grammatical control are noticeable. For example, “there are 4 different kinds of sectors … provided that is” has faulty agreement and clause structure, while “Manufacturing … sees a positive upward” does not form a complete, accurate description. Missing or misplaced punctuation also affects readability, as in “1960 whereas, Healthcare” and “on the other hand also rises.” Check subject–verb agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries, and practise forming accurate comparisons with past-tense verbs throughout.

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