Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph illustrates data about the number of jobs across four different sectors of the US economy from 1960 to 2020, a period of 60 years. Overall, the jobs in healthcare and retail sectors had the significant increase over the period. While jobs in manufacturing and agriculture sectors had declined throughout the years.

In 1960, jobs in healthcare were almost about 3 million which then went to 5 million in 1980 and then had a great increased to 16 milllion in 2020. Jobs in retail sector also rose from 6 million in 1960 and 10 million in 1980 and in 2000 it was at 15 then it leveled off there and went to 16 million in 2020.

On the other hand, Jobs in manufacturing was more than any sector in 1960 which was 15 million and it went up to all time high at 20 in 1980 which then dropped of to 17 million in 2000 and then it declined to 13 million in the last year. However, Jobs in agriculture sector was also as same as retail but both of them followed a different pattern and agriculture had decreased to almost 3 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You provide a clear overview of the broad contrast: healthcare and retail rise, while manufacturing and agriculture fall overall. The manufacturing figures are reported accurately, and the retail account captures its steady growth. However, the overview overgeneralises by saying manufacturing declined “throughout”; it first rises to a peak in 1980. The agriculture description also gives an inaccurate endpoint: it falls to about 2 million in 2020, not “almost 3 million,” and the comparison that it was the same as retail applies only in 1960. Healthcare starts at about 2 million rather than almost 3. These are limited inaccuracies within an otherwise relevant summary. To strengthen the response, make the overview more precise and report the key turning points and final rankings consistently.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response is arranged in a sensible sequence: an introduction and overview are followed by paragraphs describing the rising and falling sectors. This makes the main comparisons easy to follow, and transitions such as “On the other hand” help signal contrast. The overview’s “While” clause is not fully integrated into a complete sentence, however, and the final paragraph’s “However” does not clearly express the relationship between manufacturing and agriculture. Some information is also compressed into long chains joined by “and then,” particularly in the retail and manufacturing descriptions. This meets the lower-band expectation of an overall coherent arrangement, with some progression toward more flexible cohesion. Use clearer sentence boundaries and vary linking devices to show sequence, contrast, and comparison more precisely.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “illustrates,” “rose,” “declined,” “all time high,” and “leveled off,” so the trends are generally understandable. There are also attempts at more descriptive phrasing, such as “followed a different pattern.” However, several choices or forms are inaccurate or awkward: “had the significant increase” is not a natural collocation, “had a great increased” uses the wrong word form, and “dropped of” is misspelled. “Went to” is repeated where more precise trend verbs would improve the report. These errors do not prevent understanding, but they limit precision and control. Aim for accurate collocations and a wider selection of verbs such as “climbed,” “peaked,” “fell,” and “remained stable.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex structures, including the opening sentence and the contrastive overview, and the reader can follow the main message. However, some sentence forms are faulty or incomplete. “While jobs in manufacturing and agriculture sectors had declined throughout the years” is a dependent clause without a main clause, and “jobs in manufacturing was” has a subject–verb agreement error. The phrase “jobs in healthcare were almost about 3 million” also combines two approximating expressions awkwardly, while “it went up to all time high at 20” lacks an article and a clear noun phrase. Long sentences linked repeatedly with “and then” make control less secure. Practise complete clauses, agreement, articles, and varied sentence patterns; these corrections would make the report more consistently accurate.

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