Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-07
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
the line graph below illistratre number of jobs in manufacturing retail agricluter and healthcare between the time period of 1960 to 1920
overall it can be seen retail and healthcare were boosting the econmy and manufacturing and agriclture was becoming low
from the year 1960 to 1980 manufacturing was on its peak after the year 1980 to 2020 it started decline from 20 miilion to 13 million on the other side retail jobs never experince any decline in jobs it started from 6 million to 16 from the year of 1960 to 2020
however agriculture sector was effeced the most from 1960 it went from 6 million to 2 the highest change in the line graph was seen in healthcare were it was started from the least number of employes from the year 1960 but it expernce the highest change from the year 1980 where the number of jobs were in 16 million
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You identify the main broad patterns: manufacturing rises to a peak and then falls, retail increases, agriculture declines, and healthcare grows from the lowest starting point. However, some key details are inaccurate or unclear. The graph ends in 2020, not 1920, and healthcare reaches about 16 million only in 2020; in 1980 it is about 5 million. The statement that retail “never experience any decline” is broadly supported, but its rise from 6 to 16 million would be clearer if the intermediate figures were included. Your overview also says manufacturing and agriculture were “becoming low,” which does not distinguish their very different levels and trends. Select and report the main comparisons more precisely, especially the sectors’ relative positions by 2020.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
There is a basic overall structure: an opening sentence, an overview, and further details about the sectors. The response also uses simple linking expressions such as “overall,” “from the year,” and “on the other side.” However, progression is difficult to follow because several trends are packed into long, loosely connected sentences, and the final sentence combines healthcare’s starting point, its growth, and an incorrect date without clear sequencing. Paragraphing is limited, and repeated time phrases make the account feel mechanical. Organise the details into clearer comparisons—for example, manufacturing and retail in one paragraph, then agriculture and healthcare—and use accurate links such as “whereas” and “by 2020” to show contrasts and stages.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “peak,” “decline,” “sector,” and “number of jobs,” so the topic is generally recognisable. However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make parts of the report difficult to understand, including “illistratre,” “agricluter,” “econmy,” “expernce,” and “employes.” Phrases such as “boosting the economy” do not accurately describe what the graph measures: it shows job numbers, not economic performance. “The highest change” is also imprecise when you mean the largest increase. Build a more accurate set of trend expressions, such as “rose steadily,” “fell gradually,” and “recorded the largest increase,” and check spelling and collocations before submitting.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response attempts to describe changes over time and uses some connected clauses, but sentence structures are mostly simple or loosely joined, and errors are frequent enough to make relationships unclear. For example, “manufacturing was on its peak after the year 1980 to 2020 it started decline” lacks clear clause boundaries and has an incorrect verb pattern. In “it was started from the least number,” the passive form is not appropriate, while “the number of jobs were” has subject–verb disagreement. Articles, tense forms, and punctuation are also inconsistently controlled. Practise writing complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and use past-tense forms consistently for the historical data, such as “Healthcare rose from about 2 million in 1960 to 16 million in 2020.”
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