Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The given line graph illustrates the information about the number of works in four sectors of the economy in US from 1960 to 2020.

Overview, years are given on x-axis and on y- axis jobs are mention in millions from 0 to 25. Retail and Healthcare followed the highest trend, while Manufacturing and Agriculture showed the lowest figure.

According to the graph, in 1960 Healthcare was at approximately 2 million and it increased shaply between1980 and 2020 and reached at above 15 million. Similarly, Retail demonstrated noticeable growth it was above 5 million in 1960 and after this year, it rose gradually and arrived at 15 million in 2000 and it inclined slowly which was above 15 million.

Furthermore, in initial state Manufacturing showed maximum numbers of jobs but in 1980, it touched at peak point which was 20 million and it declined throughout the period. Additionally, Agriculture depicted the minimum point and it fell during [redacted phone].

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main broad patterns: healthcare and retail rise, manufacturing peaks in 1980 before declining, and agriculture remains the smallest sector. Several figures are also reported accurately, including healthcare at about 2 million initially and manufacturing at 20 million in 1980. However, the overview is unclear when it says retail and healthcare “followed the highest trend” and manufacturing and agriculture “showed the lowest figure”; it does not clearly state the key endpoint comparison, where retail and healthcare both reach about 16 million in 2020. The agriculture trend is only briefly described, and the manufacturing account omits its starting value and later levels. Develop the overview with precise comparisons and support each sector’s trend with selected figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs describing the sectors. Sequencing is generally understandable, and transitions such as “Similarly” and “Furthermore” help connect points. However, the overview is combined with a description of the axes, and the grouping of sectors across the later paragraphs is not fully clear. Some linking is mechanical, particularly the repeated use of “Additionally” and “Furthermore,” while “after this year” does not clearly identify a time point. The final paragraph also ends without a concluding comparison. Separate the overview from detailed reporting, group related trends deliberately, and use clearer time references so the progression is easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of trend vocabulary, including “increased,” “declined,” “gradually,” “peak point,” and “minimum point,” which makes the main movements understandable. However, several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for describing a graph: “number of works” should be “number of jobs,” “followed the highest trend” is unclear, and “arrived at 15 million” is less natural than “reached 15 million.” There are also spelling errors, including “shaply,” and some repetition of general terms such as “increased” and “fell.” Aim for precise collocations and check spelling; varied verbs such as “climbed,” “stood at,” and “remained stable” can describe changes more naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses linked with “while,” “but,” and “which,” and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. Some grammatical errors remain, however. For example, “jobs are mention in millions” has an incorrect verb form, and “in US” needs an article. In “it increased … and reached at above 15 million,” the verb pattern and preposition are not controlled; write “it increased … and reached just over 15 million.” The sentence beginning “Overview, years are given…” is also awkwardly constructed, and punctuation spacing is inconsistent. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and complete sentence structures, while retaining the complex clauses you have attempted.

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