Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

this graph illustratres, the data on number of jobs in 4 areas of the economy, the four sectors are manufacturing, retail, agriculture and lastly, healthcare in the US, around 1860 to 2020.

Overall, manufacturing jobs are substantial while there is decline in employment of agriculture.

The retail and healthcare jobs roses from 1960 onwards, to 2000.

Manufacturing jobs was highest in 1980 about 20 million and in 1960 it was 15 million but , there was a decline after 1980 in 2000 followed by 2020.

In contrast, agriculture and retail employment rate was same about 6 million in 1960 nevertheless, there was a great change, The retail prices started to improved untill 2000 about 16 million while, the agriculture employment rate decline till 2000 about 2.5 million.

The healthcare also seem to be improved it increases from 1960 to 2000 moreover the retail and healthcare employment rate in 2000 is same about 16 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and report several important patterns, including manufacturing peaking at about 20 million in 1980 and agriculture declining overall. However, some details are inaccurate or unclear: retail reaches about 15 million in 2000 and 16 million in 2020, not 16 million by 2000, and healthcare rises to about 11 million in 2000 before reaching 16 million in 2020. The overview is also incomplete: it notes agriculture’s decline but does not clearly summarise the contrasting long-term growth in retail and healthcare or the changing ranking of the sectors. Develop the overview around these main trends, then support it with accurate comparisons at key dates.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some organisation: you begin by introducing the chart, give an overview, and then describe manufacturing, agriculture, retail and healthcare. This gives the reader a basic route through the information. However, progression is not consistently clear, partly because several trends are combined in long sentences and the time sequence becomes confusing. For example, the sentence beginning “In contrast, agriculture and retail…” moves between their shared starting point and later trends without clearly separating the comparisons. Linking words such as “nevertheless,” “while,” and “moreover” are sometimes used inaccurately or mechanically. Use distinct paragraphs for the overview and details, and group the rising sectors together before contrasting them with the declining sectors.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant chart vocabulary, including “decline,” “employment,” “sectors,” and “million,” so the topic is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the meaning unclear. “Retail prices” does not describe the number of retail jobs, and “employment rate” is not the same as the number of people employed. “Improved” is also unsuitable for describing a rise in job numbers. Spelling errors such as “illustratres” and “untill” further reduce accuracy. Aim for precise, repeated-use terms such as “the number of jobs,” “employment,” “rose,” and “fell,” rather than using approximate alternatives.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including comparisons introduced with “while” and “in contrast.” However, errors are frequent and sometimes make relationships between figures difficult to follow. Examples include “manufacturing jobs was highest,” where subject–verb agreement is incorrect, and “the retail and healthcare jobs roses,” which has an incorrect verb form. Tense and sentence construction are also inconsistent, as in “the retail prices started to improved” and the long sentence beginning “In contrast, agriculture and retail employment rate was same.” Punctuation around conjunctions is often faulty, with commas separating clauses incorrectly. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and build shorter, complete comparison sentences before adding complex clauses.

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