Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The give chart provides information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, from 1960 to 2020 in milltons.

At the first glance, the number of heathcare jobs increased from 1960 to 2020 by 15 million while, the number of agriculure jobs decreaed slowly throghout the given time period.

Moreover, in 1960 the number of manufactring jobs was 15 million whareas they went down around 7 million in 2020.

Overall, the number of healthcare jobs were more than other four sectors.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify relevant features, including healthcare’s rise and agriculture’s decline, and give manufacturing figures for 1960 and 2020. However, the response addresses the task only minimally: it omits the retail trend and the important comparisons among sectors, and the overview claim that healthcare had more jobs than the other sectors is inaccurate for much of the period. Manufacturing peaked at about 20 million in 1980, while retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million by 2020. The response is also 72 words, below the required 150, so there is not enough detail to summarise the graph adequately. Add a clear overview and support it with accurate comparisons across the four years and sectors.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic sequence: an introduction, two statements about trends, and a concluding sentence. Connectors such as “Moreover” and “Overall” show an attempt to guide the reader. However, the ideas do not develop into a clear, complete progression through the graph, and the short paragraphs leave key information disconnected or absent. “At the first glance” introduces one trend, but the next paragraph shifts to manufacturing without comparing it with retail or healthcare. Build a more logical structure by giving an overview after the introduction, then grouping the main trends and comparisons in the body. Use linking expressions to show relationships, rather than relying on a few general transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “increased,” “decreased,” “throughout,” and “number of jobs,” so the main trends are generally recognisable. However, the range is limited and several spelling errors make the writing less clear, for example “milltons,” “heathcare,” “agriculure,” “decreaed,” and “manufactring.” Some phrasing is also unnatural: “At the first glance” and “went down around 7 million” are not precise ways to describe the data. Use accurate sector names and expressions such as “rose by,” “fell to,” and “reached approximately.” A wider set of comparison terms, including “whereas,” “overtook,” and “remained the lowest,” would help you report the graph more precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and a longer sentence with “while,” showing some effort to vary sentence structure. The basic meaning is usually understandable, but grammatical control is uneven. In “the number of healthcare jobs were,” the singular subject “number” requires “was.” The sentence beginning “At the first glance” also has awkward punctuation around “while,” and “in 2020” would be clearer than placing the time phrase after “went down.” Most sentences follow a simple pattern, so there is little evidence of a wider range of accurately controlled structures. Practise forming comparisons with clauses such as “while healthcare rose, agriculture declined,” and check subject–verb agreement and punctuation when joining ideas.

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