Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, In general the manufacturing has high number of obtain jobs in this graph where agricultural has lowest and the declined number of jobs obtain.

To begin with manufacturing the number of jobs obtain are 1960 between 1980 the line of job obtain grows 15 to 20 million where 1980 to 2020 the number of jobs obtain are decrease below at 15. Then in retail the number of jobs are rise to 5 to 15 million.In Agricultural the number of jobs obtain between 1960 to 1980 decrease where 1980 to 2020 the job obtain number are same. In health care sector the number of jobs obtain are grow this sector start at 0 in 1960 and increase 15 million jobs where large amount of people are comes at this sector

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the four sectors and report several relevant trends, including manufacturing rising to a peak before declining and agriculture falling overall. However, the overview is unclear and partly inaccurate: manufacturing does not remain the highest throughout, since retail and healthcare both reach about 16 million by 2020, compared with manufacturing at about 13 million. Healthcare starts at around 2 million, not zero, and reaches about 16 million, rather than 15 million. Retail’s rise is also described without clear start and end years. The response contains 130 words, below the required 150, which limits the detail and development of the summary. Add a precise overview and select key comparisons across the period.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic structure, with an overview followed by discussion of the sectors, and sequencing phrases such as “To begin with” and “Then” help signal movement between points. However, progression is difficult to follow because several trends are compressed into long, loosely connected sentences. For example, the manufacturing sentence combines the rise and subsequent fall without clearly identifying the years for each stage. The overview also repeats itself (“Overall, In general”), while transitions between retail, agriculture and healthcare feel abrupt. Use one clear overview paragraph and organise the details into logical groups, such as declining versus growing sectors. Shorter sentences and more precise links between comparisons would make the progression clearer.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

Your vocabulary is sufficient to identify the main sectors and describe basic movement, using terms such as “grows,” “decrease” and “increase.” However, the range is limited and several repeated or inaccurate phrases make the report difficult to read, especially “number of jobs obtain,” which is not a natural way to describe employment figures. “Agricultural” is used where the sector name “agriculture” is needed, and “large amount of people are comes” does not clearly express a chart trend. Aim for accurate, varied expressions such as “employment,” “rose,” “fell,” “remained stable” and “reached a peak.” Avoid adding claims about people entering a sector when the graph only shows job numbers.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to describe changes over time and use some connected clauses, but the range of sentence structures is limited and errors are frequent enough to make several statements hard to interpret. Examples include “the number of jobs obtain are,” “the number of jobs are rise,” and “people are comes,” where verb forms and subject–verb agreement are not controlled. Time relationships are also unclear in “1960 between 1980” and “where 1980 to 2020.” Punctuation is inconsistent, with missing spaces after full stops and commas. Practise a reliable pattern such as “Employment rose from X in 1960 to Y in 1980, then fell to Z by 2020,” checking tense, agreement and prepositions in each sentence.

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