Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given line graph illustrates the information about the number of work opportunities in four sectors of the economy in the Us from 1960 to 2020. The given data given in the millions.

To commence with, manufacuturing began with 15 in 1960 and move up by 5 in two decades then it surprisingly decreased by 12 million from 1980 to 2020. Retail was started from 5 million and it increased by 16 million till 2020. Over 60 years retail got more workers.

The job in healthcare have so many opportunities in healthcare so it increased rapidly by 12 million in 2020 from 2 million in beginning year. Agriculture has started from 5 million in the beginning year and then rapidly decreased by 3 million in 1980. Then it remained similar at 2-3 millionfrom 1980 to 2020.

Overall,the healthcare offers more job opporunities and they rapidly incresed rapidly. Agriculture experience n extreme downfall

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four sectors and report several broad trends, including manufacturing’s rise and later decline, healthcare’s growth, and agriculture’s fall. However, some figures and comparisons are inaccurate: retail rises from about 6 to 16 million, not from 5 to 16 million, and manufacturing falls by about 7 million from 1980 to 2020, not 12 million. The overview is also incomplete: healthcare and retail both reach roughly 16 million by 2020, while manufacturing remains higher than either until 2000. Agriculture’s decline is gradual rather than an “extreme downfall.” The response is 143 words, seven short of the 150-word minimum; this limits the opportunity to select and explain the main features fully. Add a clearer overview and check key values.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic structure: an introduction, paragraphs describing sector trends, and a concluding overview. This gives the reader some organisation, and phrases such as “then” and “from 1980 to 2020” help indicate sequence. However, progression is not consistently clear because several sectors are compressed into short, loosely connected statements, and the overview repeats the healthcare point rather than synthesising the main comparisons. Some links are awkward or unclear, such as “The job in healthcare have so many opportunities in healthcare so it increased rapidly.” Paragraphing could more clearly separate the overview from the detailed comparisons. Use a consistent sequence—overview first, then grouped trends—and connect comparisons explicitly, for example, noting that retail and healthcare converge by 2020.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant task vocabulary, including “increased,” “decreased,” “remained,” and “million,” so the main trends are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and some expressions are imprecise or repetitive. “Work opportunities” and “offers more job opportunities” do not accurately describe the graph, which shows numbers of jobs, while “got more workers” is informal. “Surprisingly decreased” and “extreme downfall” are also unsuitable or overstated descriptions of the data. Spelling errors such as “manufacuturing,” “oppurunities,” and “incresed” are noticeable and weaken clarity. Aim for precise trend language and accurate collocations, such as “employment in manufacturing fell” or “the number of healthcare jobs rose steadily.” Check spelling carefully before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, and the reader can usually understand the intended trends. However, grammatical errors occur frequently and sometimes make relationships difficult to follow. For example, “manufacturing began with 15 … and move up” has an incorrect verb form, while “The job in healthcare have” has subject–verb disagreement. The sentence “The given data given in the millions” is incomplete, and “it increased rapidly by 12 million in 2020 from 2 million in beginning year” has an unclear structure and missing article. Punctuation and spacing also need attention, as in “Overall,the” and “millionfrom.” Practise accurate past-tense reporting and complete sentence patterns, then proofread for agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries.

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