Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given line graph illustrates that information about the number of jobs in different four sector of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, jobs in manufacturing sector decreased slightly bythe time. While in retail sector number of jobs were increased dring the period. However, intersection in agrticulture and healthare sector also with retail.

To begin with, in manufacturing sector there were 15 millions job in 1960 and it increased to 20 millions but, after 1980, it started decreasing moderately to about 14 millions job by 2020. As compared with, retail sector with almost 5.2 millions job in 1960 and it increased significantly to over 15.2 millions job by 2020.

On the other hand, agriculture with over 5 millions job in 1960 and it start decreased moderately to 2 millions job by 2020. However, in healthcare sector job started with almost 2 millions and it increased moderately to 15.2 millions job by 2020 and it get intersected in retail sector in the end of decade.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main broad movements: manufacturing rises to a peak and then declines, retail and healthcare grow, and agriculture falls. You also include relevant figures for the start and end of the period. However, the overview is unclear and does not fully capture the key comparisons. In particular, healthcare catches up with retail by 2020, with both at about 16 million jobs; the phrase “intersected in retail sector in the end of decade” is imprecise. Some figures are also less accurate than the chart suggests: retail begins at about 6 million, not 5.2 million, and manufacturing ends at about 13 million rather than 14 million. A clearer overview and more precise comparisons would make the main features better developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs describing the sectors. Grouping manufacturing with retail and agriculture with healthcare gives the reader a workable route through the data. However, progression is sometimes weakened by unclear or mechanical linking. For example, “As compared with” does not form a clear comparison, while “On the other hand” does not accurately signal the relationship between the two sectors that follow. The overview’s “However” and “also with” leave the relationship among agriculture, healthcare and retail difficult to follow. Use transitions that express the actual contrast or similarity, and make each paragraph’s comparison explicit. Clearer referencing would also help readers understand which sector “it” refers to.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant chart vocabulary, including “increased,” “decreased,” “moderately,” and “significantly,” and the sector names make the subject clear. However, the range is limited and some word choices or collocations are inaccurate or awkward, which sometimes makes the meaning less precise. Examples include “intersection in agriculture and healthcare sector,” “jobs were increased,” and “it get intersected in retail sector.” “Intersection” is not the natural term for two lines reaching the same level; describe the figures as becoming equal or converging. There are also spelling errors such as “agrticulture” and “healthare.” Aim for accurate, natural phrases for trends and comparisons rather than relying on repeated forms of “increased” and “decreased.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, and the overall meaning is generally recoverable. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly with articles, plurals, agreement and verb forms. For example, “in different four sector” needs a plural noun and a more natural determiner, while “15 millions job” should use a singular unit expression and plural “jobs.” In “number of jobs were increased,” the subject and verb do not agree, and the passive construction is not appropriate for this trend. The overview phrase “jobs in manufacturing sector decreased slightly bythe time” also has an incomplete time expression. Practise accurate sentence patterns such as “the number of jobs increased from…to…” and check agreement and articles when revising.

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