Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 7.0)

The line chart illustrates the employement figures across four different economy sectors of the United States from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the manufacturing sector recorded the highest number of people initially, before falling drastically over the period. Meanwhile, the healthcare sector started with the lowest number of people but increased substantially at the end of the period. However, the agriculture sector was the smallest employer throughout the period.

In 1960, the manufacturing stood at 15 million people and peaked at 20 million in 1980, before dropping steadily to around 14 million in 2020. Meanwhile, the healthcare sector started as the lowest employer with just 2 million people in 1960 but later surged to just over 15 million people in 2020, matching with the retail sector.

In contrast, the retail sector stood at just 6 million in 1960, similar to the agriculture. It then increased substantially to exactly 15 million of people in 2000 and continued to marginally grow to nearly 16 million after two decades. Meanwhile, the agriculture showed a contrasting trend, it showed just over 5 million people initially, before gradually falling to roughly 2 million of people, recording the smallest employer at the end of the period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.5

The response selects the main trends and supports them with relevant figures: manufacturing peaks at 20 million in 1980 before declining, while healthcare rises from 2 million to around 16 million. The overview also identifies agriculture as the smallest employer throughout, which matches the chart. Comparisons between retail and agriculture at the start and between retail and healthcare at the end help address the task fully. A few details are slightly imprecise: manufacturing is about 13 million in 2020 rather than 14, and healthcare reaches about 16 million, matching retail, rather than just over 15. These are small inaccuracies, and the account remains clear and well supported; greater precision in the endpoint figures would strengthen it further.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response is organised effectively into an introduction, an overview and two detail paragraphs. Its progression is easy to follow, and linking expressions such as “Overall,” “Meanwhile” and “In contrast” help signal relationships between the sectors. The grouping of manufacturing and healthcare, followed by retail and agriculture, is a sensible way to present the data. However, “Meanwhile” is repeated several times, and the final paragraph’s sentence beginning “Meanwhile, the agriculture showed a contrasting trend, it showed…” joins two independent clauses awkwardly. Use a full stop or a conjunction there, and vary the transitions so that cohesion feels more flexible and less repetitive.

Lexical Resource: Band 7.0

There is a suitable range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “peaked,” “dropping steadily,” “surged,” “marginally grow” and “gradually falling.” These choices make the main movements clear, and the writer uses relevant terms such as “sector” and “employer.” Some collocations and word forms are less natural: “employement figures” is misspelled, “15 million of people” is awkward, and “matching with the retail sector” is not idiomatic. “The agriculture” is also an unnatural way to refer to the sector. More precise, natural phrasing—such as “employment,” “15 million people,” and “matching the retail figure”—would improve control while retaining the useful range already shown.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 7.0

The response uses a good mix of simple and complex structures, including the contrast in “the manufacturing sector recorded the highest number… before falling” and the time sequence “It then increased… and continued to…”. Most sentences are clear and grammatically controlled. A few errors remain: “the manufacturing stood” needs an article or a more complete noun phrase, and “the agriculture showed a contrasting trend, it showed…” is a comma splice. In “continued to marginally grow,” the placement of the adverb is awkward; “continued to grow marginally” is smoother. Check sentence boundaries and article use, especially when naming sectors, to make the otherwise varied structures consistently accurate.

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