Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-08
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It illustrate about different number of jobs of four sectors of economy in Unites states From 1960 to 2020.The jobs vary upto 25 milions ,and the ratio of jobs vary from year to year.
There are four sectors which inludes manufacturing retail agriculture and healthcare.Healthcare have the most job oppurtunities as compared to all other sectors.The Agriculture ratio drops drastically in 2020.
In 1960, manufacturing sector have the highest job ratio of 15 millions and at its peak of 20 millions in 1980 but then afterward it drops down But in comaprison the healthcare have the lowest oppurtunites in 1960 and it demand increases year by year and in 2020 it reachess upto 16 millions.The agriculture sector have 6 millions jobs in 1960 and the number of jobs does not increases over time and at last it demands only 2.5 millions.The Retail sector jobs increases over the time and its the most demanding proffesion in 2020 which offers 16 millions same as healthcare.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You identify the four sectors and report several important patterns: manufacturing peaks in 1980 before declining, healthcare rises substantially, and agriculture falls to a low level. The figures you give for manufacturing and the final healthcare and retail values are broadly consistent with the chart. However, the overview is unclear: “Healthcare have the most job opportunities” is not true across the whole period, since manufacturing leads in 1960, 1980 and 2000; healthcare only ties with retail in 2020. The claim that agriculture “does not increases over time” is also imprecise, as it declines from 6 million to 3 million and then 2 million. A clearer overview and more accurate comparisons across the years would make the key features more fully addressed.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a basic overall sequence, moving from an introduction to general comments and then to sector details. This gives the reader some sense of organisation, and comparisons such as manufacturing’s peak followed by decline are relevant. However, the progression is not consistently clear: the opening repeats general statements about variation, while the overview mixes claims about healthcare and agriculture without establishing the main trends. The final paragraph contains several long, joined ideas, making comparisons harder to follow. Use distinct paragraphs for the overview and key details, and connect each sector’s figures in a logical order. More precise linking and reference would also help clarify phrases such as “it” and “its” when several sectors are being discussed.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “sector,” “peak,” “drops,” and “increases,” and the reader can generally identify the trends you intend to describe. However, the range is limited and several choices or collocations are inaccurate or repetitive. Phrases such as “job ratio,” “job opportunities,” and “most demanding profession” do not describe the number of jobs shown naturally; “employment,” “number of jobs,” or “largest sector” would be more suitable. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “Unites,” “milions,” “oppurtunities,” and “comaprison,” which reduce the accuracy of the writing. Aim for precise chart vocabulary and check spelling before submitting.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and longer sentences, and the main message is usually understandable. However, errors in sentence structure and basic grammar occur throughout. For example, “It illustrate” needs subject–verb agreement, while “manufacturing sector have” and “the healthcare have” require an appropriate article and verb form. Tense and agreement are also inconsistent in “the number of jobs does not increases” and “it reachess.” Several sentences run together without clear punctuation, particularly the final paragraph, which makes relationships between ideas difficult to follow. Practise accurate present-tense descriptions of chart trends and use shorter, controlled sentences alongside longer comparisons. Careful proofreading for agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries would improve clarity.
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