Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.0)

the line graph illustrates the number if jobs

in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall,there are four sectors are manufacturing ,Retai,Agriculture,Healthcare etecetera.Which is measure at millions .Retail and healthcare was slightly increased while manufacturing at beggining increased after that it is decresed dramatically .

Agriculture wasdecreased slowly 1960 to 2020

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You identify the graph’s subject and mention all four sectors, and your overview recognises that manufacturing rises before falling while agriculture declines. However, the response reports almost none of the key comparisons or figures: for example, manufacturing peaks at about 20 million in 1980, while retail and healthcare both reach roughly 16 million by 2020. The description of retail and healthcare as increasing “slightly” also misses their substantial growth, especially healthcare. The response is only 43 words, below the required 150, and therefore leaves the task very minimally addressed. Develop the overview around the main contrasts, then support it with accurate figures at the four dates.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: an opening sentence is followed by a paragraph beginning “Overall,” which signals a summary. The reader can also identify the broad topics being discussed. However, the response is too brief to establish a clear progression through the graph, and the overview combines several points without explaining how they relate. The sentence listing the sectors does not advance the comparison, while the final agriculture statement is left as a separate fragment of information. Use a clear sequence—for example, overview first, then manufacturing and agriculture, followed by retail and healthcare—and connect comparisons with simple linking phrases such as “by contrast” and “whereas.”

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

Your vocabulary includes relevant terms such as “line graph,” “sectors,” “increased,” and “decreased,” so the general subject is recognisable. However, the range is very limited, and several word-choice or spelling problems reduce clarity: “number if jobs,” “Retai,” “etecetera,” and “dramatically” (for a decline that is gradual across the period) are examples. “Slightly increased” also understates the substantial rises in retail and healthcare. Aim for precise trend language, such as “rose steadily,” “climbed sharply,” “peaked at,” and “fell gradually,” and use sector names accurately. Proofreading spelling and choosing words that match the scale of each change would make the description more informative.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt a simple opening sentence and an overview, but grammatical control is inconsistent. In “Overall,there are four sectors are…,” the sentence contains two competing verb structures; “Retail and healthcare was” also has a subject–verb agreement error. The phrase “Agriculture wasdecreased slowly 1960 to 2020” has an incorrect passive construction and lacks the preposition needed to express the time period. Punctuation and spacing are also unreliable, including missing spaces after commas and a full stop before “Which,” which creates an incomplete sentence. Practise accurate simple past forms (“rose,” “fell”) and complete sentences before adding more complex comparisons. Clear sentence boundaries and agreement would make your meaning easier to follow.

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