Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

There are 4 sectors which provides suitable jobs to millions of people. In the graph it shows how the 4 sectors gives job and how much the number of jobs are there in each sector. The sectors are as follows: They are Manufacturing, retail, agriculture and last healthcare. It shows how jobs are increasing and decreasing in each sector over a period of time. The graph contains the data from the year 1960 to 2020.

First, let's talk about the number of jobs in healthcare sector. At the initial time the jobs in healthcare sector is very low. Because at that time people don't give iportance to health. They neglect their own health and started to get treatment at their home only without any proper medication. But, as the time passes people knows the importance of health and due to these the jobs in healthcare sector increases exponentially. Among all the four sectors the number of jobs incresese mostly in healthcare sector over a period of time.

Now, let's talk about the most important sector called agriculture. It is the most important sector because it gives us the basic need of survival which is food. But right now in agriculture the number of job is getting decreased. It becomes least in 2020 because no one right now want to do hardwork on the field, They just want to do sit and do work. So, the number of jobs in agriculture is minimum among the four sector.

Now, let's talk about retail. In the year 1960 More than 5 millions jobs are present in the year 1960. Over the period of time from 19060 to 2000 the number of jobs increased gradually. After 2000 the growth becomes slow. Right now also after 2000 it is increasing but not rapidly.

So, last sector is manufacturing sector. Already, in 1960 there are 15 millions jobs are there. The manufacturing unit is at it's peak during 1980. It shows that in 1980 there are 20 millions jobs which is most among all. But after 1980we can suddenly see the drop in the number of jobs don't know why. And also in 2020 it comes below it's starting point which is 15 millions.

So these are given in graph number of jobs are present in each sector. The number of jobs are minimum in healthcare sector but at that time the number of jobs in manufacturing unit is at it's peaks but by late 2020 it becomes opposite. The healthcare sector is at it's top and the manufacturing unit falls rapidly. But the least jobs in 2020 is in agriculture sector. So, these are the given comparison of number of jobs in millions in mainly 4 sectors.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify all four sectors and describe several broad trends, including healthcare’s rise, agriculture’s decline, and manufacturing’s peak in 1980 followed by a fall. However, the response only partly fulfils the task because it gives little reliable numerical comparison and includes unsupported explanations about people’s attitudes to health and reluctance to work in agriculture. Some details are inaccurate: healthcare is not the lowest sector in 2020; it reaches about 16 million, level with retail, while agriculture is lowest at about 2 million. Retail rises from about 6 to 16 million, but the claim that growth slows after 2000 is not clearly supported. Focus on an accurate overview and select key figures rather than speculating about causes.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with separate paragraphs for healthcare, agriculture, retail and manufacturing, followed by a concluding comparison. This makes the main subject easy to follow. However, progression is weakened by the repeated formula “Now, let’s talk about…” and by a long introduction that restates the graph’s topic rather than presenting its main features. The conclusion also repeats earlier points and gives a contradictory comparison, saying healthcare has the fewest jobs before describing it as the top sector. Use a concise overview near the beginning, group related trends where possible, and use linking phrases to show comparisons and changes without relying on repeated announcements.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary such as “sector,” “increased,” “decreased,” “peak,” and “minimum,” so the reader can generally understand the trends being discussed. However, the range is limited and several expressions are informal, repetitive or imprecise for an academic report. Phrases such as “let’s talk about,” “right now,” “hardwork on the field,” and “don’t know why” sound conversational, while “increases exponentially” overstates the trend. There are also noticeable spelling and word-form errors, including “iportance,” “incresese,” and “millions jobs.” Aim for precise reporting language and accurate collocations, for example “employment rose steadily” or “the sector recorded the lowest figure,” and avoid explanations not shown by the graph.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, control is inconsistent, particularly with subject–verb agreement, articles, plurals and sentence construction. Examples include “the 4 sectors gives job,” “the number of jobs … is very low,” and “there are 15 millions jobs are there,” where agreement or clause structure is faulty. Tense and punctuation also need attention: “people knows” shifts incorrectly, and some sentences run together or contain awkward fragments, such as “Because at that time…” and “But after 1980we…”. Practise building clear comparison sentences with a consistent past tense, such as “Manufacturing employment peaked at 20 million in 1980 before declining.”

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