Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Employment sector plays a vital role in the economy of a nation especially when it comes to sectors like manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare. The top most leading sectors providing employment to the people according to the survey of 2020 includes healthcare and retail, it is being seen that the employment opportunities in manufacturing sector are declining throughout the recent years, and the opportunities in agriculture sector have been observed as the least employment generating sector throughout the years. In 1980, it is being observed that the manufacturing sector shows a significant raise in its number of job available while the sectors of retail and healthcare shows a constant raise in terms of employment opportunities throughout the time periof of 1960 to 2020. The agriculture sector must take this in consideration about their declining level and improve their job market for the young people who are interested in this sector.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify several relevant overall features: manufacturing reaches a high point in 1980 and then declines, while agriculture remains the smallest sector, and healthcare and retail are the leading sectors by 2020. However, the account is only partial and some claims are imprecise. Retail and healthcare do not both rise steadily throughout: retail increases from 6 million in 1960 to 10 million in 1980 and 15 million in 2000, while healthcare rises from 2 to 5 to 11 million. The response also omits the important comparison that healthcare catches up with retail at about 16 million by 2020, and gives few figures to support its summary. Focus on describing the chart rather than advising agriculture to improve its job market.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response contains relevant information, but it is presented as one long paragraph with no clear separation between an overview and supporting details. The opening general statement about employment sectors does not help organise the chart summary, and the sequence moves from 2020 back to 1980 before making a broad comment about the whole period. Linking phrases such as “In 1980” and “throughout the time period” provide some connections, but the long sentences combine several trends and make comparisons difficult to follow. A clearer progression would be an overview of the main changes, followed by a paragraph comparing manufacturing and agriculture and another comparing retail and healthcare.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “manufacturing,” “employment opportunities,” “declining,” and “least employment generating sector,” so the main subject is understandable. However, several phrases are awkward or imprecise for describing a graph: “top most leading sectors,” “significant raise,” and “constant raise” are not natural collocations. “Survey of 2020” also mislabels the visual, which presents figures over time rather than survey findings. There is some repetition of “sector” and “employment opportunities,” and the spelling error “periof” affects accuracy. Aim for concise, conventional trend language such as “peaked,” “increased steadily,” and “fell to the lowest level.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “especially when” and “while,” but control is uneven. For example, “the top most leading sectors … includes” has a subject–verb agreement problem, and “the sectors of retail and healthcare shows” also requires a plural verb. The sentence beginning “In 1980, it is being observed” shifts awkwardly between present and past forms, while “the manufacturing sector shows” does not maintain a consistent tense for historical data. Several sentences are long and joined by commas, which weakens punctuation and makes the relationships between ideas less clear. Use past simple consistently for the period shown and divide comparisons into shorter, accurately structured sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.