Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line bar graph illustrates the information of the US economy about the number of jobs in four sectors from 1960 to 2020. Four sector names as Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare.

Overall, the eye-catching feature is that the fluctuations have been seen in all the four sectors in Healthcare and Retail showed an upward trend whereas, Agriculture and Manufacturing represents downward trend.

In detail, Manufacturing started at 15 millions 1960 then peaked to 20 millions and continued to decrease moderately to just above 10 millions in 2020. By contrast, Agriculture stood at about 5 millions in 1960 then decreased drastically to 2.5 millions in 1980, decreased constanly by 2020 and reached to 1.5 millions.

However, Healthcare began from 2 millions in 1960 and gradually increased through the year 1980, 2000 and peaked at 2020 with Retail. Therefore, Retail initially started about 5 million in 1960 greatly hiked through the year 1980, 2000 till 2020 with Heathcare by around 15 millions respectively.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the four sectors and give a relevant overview of the broad trends: healthcare and retail rise, while agriculture declines and manufacturing falls after an early peak. Several key figures are also broadly accurate, including manufacturing’s rise from 15 to 20 million and healthcare’s start at 2 million. However, some features are less fully or clearly reported. Agriculture is described as declining constantly, although it stays around 3 million from 1980 to 2000 before falling again. The final retail figure is about 16 million, not around 15 million, and healthcare reaches about 16 million in 2020, tying with retail rather than simply peaking “with” it. Include the 2000 and 2020 healthcare values to make the comparison clearer.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, an overview, and detail paragraphs that group the declining sectors before discussing the rising ones. This gives the reader a generally logical route through the information. You also use linking expressions such as “Overall,” “By contrast,” and “However.” Some connections are less effective or mechanical, though. “Therefore” does not express a clear consequence between the healthcare and retail descriptions, and “with Retail” leaves the comparison unclear. The final paragraph also combines both rising sectors in a long sequence, making their separate trends harder to follow. Use one focused sentence for each sector and connect them with precise comparisons to make progression smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use a suitable range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “peaked,” “decreased,” “gradually increased,” and “upward trend.” These choices make the main movements understandable, and you attempt more varied wording than simple repetition of “went up” and “went down.” Some expressions are inaccurate or unnatural for this task, however: “line bar graph” mixes chart types, “eye-catching feature” is not a natural way to introduce an overview, and “greatly hiked” is an unsuitable collocation for a data trend. There are also spelling errors in “constanly” and “Heathcare.” Choose conventional chart language and precise trend verbs, and check spelling and collocations before finishing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including comparisons introduced by “By contrast” and time sequences using “then.” The main trends remain understandable despite some grammatical errors. However, errors in sentence construction and grammatical forms recur: “Four sector names as…” is a fragment, “Manufacturing started at 15 millions 1960” is missing an article or preposition, and “Agriculture and Manufacturing represents” has a subject–verb agreement problem. The sentence beginning “Therefore, Retail initially started…” also has an unclear structure and comparison. Use complete sentences, check singular and plural agreement, and include necessary articles and prepositions. More consistently controlled sentence patterns would improve accuracy while preserving variety.

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