Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-09
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 4.0)
This graph tells us about the number of jobs in the 4 different sectors of economy in the united states from the year 1920 to 2020.The trend of jobs in healthcare increased exponentially from 1980. The jobs in agriculture decreased exponentially from 1960 to 1980 but there was a stedy decline from 1960 to 2020. In the retail sector
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 3.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 3.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0
The response identifies the chart’s general subject and reports two relevant trends: healthcare rises, while agriculture declines. However, it gives an incorrect starting year (“1920” rather than 1960), and “increased exponentially” overstates the healthcare pattern. The account is incomplete: the manufacturing trend and most of the retail trend are not reported, and the final phrase, “In the retail sector,” is left unfinished. There is no clear overview comparing the four sectors or identifying the main changes across the period. The response is also substantially below the required 150 words, leaving too little information to summarise the graph adequately. To improve, provide a concise overview and compare the key figures and trends for all four sectors.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5
The response begins with a relevant introduction and then moves to healthcare and agriculture, so there is a basic sequence of ideas. However, the organisation is very limited: there are no developed paragraphs, and the final sentence stops at “In the retail sector,” leaving the reader without the point it was meant to introduce. The abrupt ending prevents a complete progression through the chart, while the lack of linking or comparison language makes relationships between the sectors unclear. Use a clear structure—an introduction, an overview, and a paragraph grouping the main trends—and complete each point. Connect comparisons explicitly, for example by contrasting manufacturing’s rise and fall with the steady growth in retail and healthcare.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
The vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the chart’s broad topic and some trends. Phrases such as “number of jobs,” “in the healthcare,” and “decreased” show an attempt to describe data rather than simply list labels. However, the range is narrow, and “increased exponentially” is an imprecise choice for the gradual rise shown; “stedy” is also misspelled, and “united states” should be capitalised as a proper name. Repetition of basic terms such as “jobs” and “sector” limits precision. Build a small range of accurate trend language, such as “rose steadily,” “declined,” “peaked,” and “remained stable,” and use comparative expressions to describe how the sectors changed relative to one another.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The response uses simple clauses and attempts a longer sentence with a contrast: “The jobs in agriculture decreased … but there was a … decline.” This shows some ability to link ideas, and the intended meaning is generally understandable. However, the range is narrow, with little variation in sentence structure, and punctuation is faulty: there is no space after the full stop in “2020.The,” and the final sentence is incomplete. The opening also needs an article and more accurate grammatical framing (“the four sectors of the economy in the United States”). Practise complete sentences with accurate past-tense reporting and comparison structures, and check sentence boundaries and punctuation before finishing.
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