Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph to illustrates information about jobs in different section of the economy in the america from 1960 to 2020. the data calibrated in millons.

Overall,the category of manufacturing experinced a incline.where as,agriculture witnessed a decline.and the retail sector and healthcare rose significantly.

In 1960, the manufacturing stood at 15 millions and increase slightly till 1980.and experinced a decline.and at arround 14 millions in 2020.In addition,the sector of agriculture counstituted 5.5 milions in 1960 and fall graduallly till 1980 and repersents 4 millions.Moreover, it remained constant till 2000.afterthat,it decrease slightly and reached 3 millions in 2020.

On the flip side,there are significant changes in healthcare and retail sectors.the retail and healthcare were stood at arround 5.5 millions and 3 millions in 1960.Moreover, it rose significantly till 2000 and accounted for 15 millions and 11 millions respectively.Furthermore,retail and healthcare follows the same speed till 2020 and counstituted 15.3 millions accordingly.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main broad patterns: manufacturing rises to a peak and then declines, agriculture falls, and retail and healthcare grow. The response also includes several relevant figures, such as manufacturing at 15 million in 1960 and retail at 15 million in 2000. However, some details are inaccurate or unclear: manufacturing peaks at about 20 million in 1980, not merely “increase slightly,” and agriculture is about 6 million in 1960, 3 million in 1980 and 2000, and 2 million in 2020. The final comparison is also incomplete: both retail and healthcare reach about 16 million in 2020, rather than the unclear “15.3 millions accordingly.” A more precise overview and clearer reporting of these key changes would strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and two paragraphs describing the sectors. This gives the reader a generally coherent route through the information, and phrases such as “Overall” and “Moreover” help signal relationships. However, some linking is mechanical or unclear. “On the flip side” does not accurately signal a contrast between the two growing sectors, and “Furthermore” introduces a final comparison whose meaning is difficult to follow. The grouping of manufacturing with agriculture, then retail with healthcare, is sensible, but the comparisons within each paragraph need clearer sequencing. Use transitions to show time changes and contrasts precisely, and make sure each sentence clearly identifies which sector and year it refers to.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “decline,” “remained constant,” “rose significantly,” and “accounted for,” so the main trends are usually understandable. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable and sometimes make the description less clear: “millons,” “experinced,” “counstituted,” and “calibrated” are problematic, while “the data calibrated” is not a natural way to describe a graph. Some phrases are also imprecise, such as “same speed” when describing the sectors’ later values. Aim for accurate, conventional chart language and check spelling carefully. A more controlled range of verbs such as “peaked,” “fell,” “levelled off,” and “reached” would help you describe changes precisely without relying on repeated general terms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences with time clauses, and the overall meaning can generally be followed. However, some grammatical errors recur. For example, “the manufacturing stood” needs an article or a different subject, and “the retail and healthcare were stood” uses an incorrect verb construction. Tense and agreement are also inconsistent in “retail and healthcare follows,” while several sentences join clauses without appropriate punctuation, as in “increase slightly till 1980.and experinced a decline.” Capitalisation after full stops is inconsistent. Practise forming complete past-tense sentences, for example, “Manufacturing increased to 20 million by 1980 before declining,” and use accurate articles, verb forms, and sentence boundaries.

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