Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The bar chart illustrates the regarding information number of jobs in different four sectors such as Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and healthcare of the economy in the United States from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, in general employment in the field of retail and healthcare increased considerably whereas number of jobs in Agriculture had lowest rate. However Manufacturing was the largest employment sector at the beginning but after 1980 employment rate decreased fastly.

On the other hand, employment sectors Retail and Agriculture had same starting point at the beginning but after that number of people employed in Retail increasing steadily and maintained the highest level in all other sectors. Although employment in Agriculture decresed overall.

Additionally, after 1980 number of people employed in Healthcare increased significantly. In the conclusion, employment in retail and healthcare increased significantly, while agriculture experienced an overall decline. Manufacturing employment fluctuated, reaching a peak before falling towards the end of the period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main broad trends: retail and healthcare rise, agriculture declines, and manufacturing peaks before falling. The statement that manufacturing was largest at the beginning and that agriculture had the lowest employment overall is supported by the chart. However, some comparisons are inaccurate or too general. Retail did not maintain the highest level throughout: manufacturing led until 2000, and retail and healthcare were tied at about 16 million in 2020. The response also omits key figures and the important contrast between manufacturing’s 1980 peak and its subsequent decline. Develop the overview with accurate comparisons across the period and support it with selected data points.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, beginning with an introduction, followed by an overview and further trend descriptions. This gives the reader a basic route through the information. However, progression is weakened by repetition: the final sentence repeats the overview, and “Overall, in general” expresses the same idea twice. Some linking phrases are awkward or do not clarify relationships, such as “On the other hand” before discussing two sectors with different trends. Group related comparisons more clearly—for example, describe manufacturing and retail together, then agriculture and healthcare—and use transitions only where they show a genuine contrast or sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “employment,” “increased considerably,” “declined,” and “peak,” so the general trends are understandable. However, the range is limited by repeated use of “number of people employed” and “employment,” while several phrases are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “the regarding information number of jobs,” “largest employment sector,” and “increasing steadily.” There are also spelling errors in “decresed” and “fastly,” which reduce precision. Choose concise chart language such as “job numbers,” “rose steadily,” and “fell sharply,” and use sector names consistently with appropriate capitalisation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of simple statements and longer sentences, including a contrast with “Although employment in Agriculture decreased overall.” However, control is uneven, and several sentence patterns are incomplete or awkward. The opening, “The bar chart illustrates the regarding information number of jobs,” has a faulty structure, while “number of people employed in Retail increasing steadily” lacks a finite verb. In “whereas number of jobs in Agriculture had lowest rate,” articles are missing. The final sentence is more controlled, but the response relies heavily on similar constructions. Practise complete clauses, article use, and consistent past-tense reporting, then check each sentence for a clear subject and verb.

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