Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The givan line graph demonstrate about the amount of workes in four diffrent departments of the economy in the US form 1960 to 2020.

Overall,at the firts glance,it is clearly visible that,highest number of in US was Manufacturing.However least amount of jobs were in Agreculture and Healthcare industry.

To commence with, in 1960 Healthcare industry jobs were 2 millions, it is gradually increased year by year. In 1980 it was 5 millions and 11 millions in 2000.Year of 2020, this year highest amounts of jobs,it is 16 millions.In 1960 Agriculture sectors jobs were 6 millions,it is plummed year by year.In 2020 it is only near around by 1 millions.

On the other hand, in Retail industry 6 millions jobs vacance, it was increased 10 millions 1980.This jobs requirments inclined to 15 millions to 16 millions in 2000 and 2020.Manufacture jobs were falctuating 15 millions to 13 millions between 1960 to 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the four sectors and report several relevant figures, including healthcare rising from 2 million to 16 million and retail increasing over the period. However, the overview is inaccurate: manufacturing was not the highest throughout, since retail and healthcare both reached about 16 million in 2020, above manufacturing at 13 million. Agriculture and healthcare were not both the least-employing sectors overall; agriculture declined to the lowest level, while healthcare grew strongly. The manufacturing trend is also reduced to “fluctuating” between 15 and 13 million, omitting its peak of 20 million in 1980. Select the main contrasts more clearly and describe each sector’s overall direction and key turning points.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic overall structure: an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs that group healthcare with agriculture and retail with manufacturing. This gives the reader some sense of progression, and phrases such as “Overall” and “On the other hand” signal relationships. However, the progression is weakened by unclear or awkward links, including “This jobs requirments inclined to 15 millions to 16 millions in 2000 and 2020,” where the sequence and comparison are difficult to follow. The overview also conflicts with the later figures, disrupting the flow of information. Use clearer time-based sequencing and connect each figure directly to its sector and year.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, such as “increased,” “plummeted,” “fluctuating,” and “jobs,” and the reader can generally identify the sectors being discussed. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes making the meaning difficult to interpret. For example, “jobs vacance” and “jobs requirments” do not naturally describe the number of jobs shown, while “plummed” appears to be an incorrect form of “plummeted.” There are also frequent spelling errors in words such as “Manufacture,” “Agreculture,” and “falctuating.” Use precise trend language and check spelling; for example, describe the number of jobs as “employment” or “the workforce,” rather than vacancies or requirements.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts both simple and longer sentences, but control is limited and errors occur frequently. Subject–verb agreement is incorrect in “The givan line graph demonstrate,” and several clauses lack the grammatical structure needed to express comparisons clearly, as in “This jobs requirments inclined to 15 millions to 16 millions.” Articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries are also inconsistent: “2 millions” should use a singular unit after a number, and “2000.Year” needs appropriate punctuation and spacing. These errors sometimes make relationships between figures unclear. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and build complete comparison sentences, such as “Healthcare employment rose from 2 million in 1960 to 16 million in 2020.”

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